Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Hacksaw Put Me Over

So the other night I called and spoke with my brother-from-another-mother, Rich, who is as big of a wrestling fanboy dork as I am. We were reminiscing while watching Monday Night RAW on our respective TV's in Orlando and Athens. "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan was on TV (who always entertains me by his goofball antics, chants of "U-S-A!", and the fact his name is "Hacksaw" but he carries a 2x4 wooden board instead of the cutting implement) about to wrestle and we discussed about the time we shared a beer with him at a tavern after an independent wrestling show a few years ago.

Rich and I walked in the bar and many wrestlers from the show were there. They were all very friendly and cordial, especially since Rich and I just had regular "bar-talk" instead of the typical "remember back in when you were in WWE" talk that they usually get from fans. We sat at the bar and spoke with good ol' "Hacksaw" for a few minutes. He was a jolly gentleman and had the thickest pair of glasses I have ever seen. I think they were made out of 4-inch thick bulletproof glass. He politely excused himself because he wanted to "talk to the purty gurls." What? He didn't want to waste his free time with two large, bearded men-children? I then went to speak with B.G. James and Tracy Brooks while Rich was elsewhere. Rich and I then departed.

Now, I told you this story to tell you about this one. As Rich and I were reminiscing about that moment, he stated, "Yeah, Hacksaw was a cool guy until he lied to that kid."
"What?"
"You don't remember?"
"When was this?"
"You were there!"
"All I remember was his funny glasses and his golly-garsh perviness for women half his age."
"He lied to a kid."
"I was talking to B.G. James and Tracy."
"Oh, what happened was that a dad and a kid walked into the bar. The kid walked over to me and asked if I was Duggan (side note: Rich is 6'5" and is a large man like myself, so it's not surprising for the uninitiated to think he or I were wrestlers.), to which I corrected him and pointed to 'Hacksaw.'"
"Okay..."
"Anyway, the kid chats with Duggan who saw the whole incident, I guess he felt a little insulted, and the kid asks if you and I were wrestlers."
"Right.."
"Duggan then states that we were a new tag team and were going to be on WWE in a few weeks."
"What?"
"Yeah, so he lied to a kid. I can't believe you missed that."
"No, no, no, Rich. He didn't lie to the kid."
"What?"
"No. Think positively. Duggan wasn't lying to the kid. 'Hacksaw' put us over."*
"(Laughter) He did!"
"I'm going to write a blog about this."
"I'm going to have to read it."

So that is how I was put over by "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan without even wrestling him or knowing about it. True American.

*- Put over: verb, wrestling slang- To endorse a fellow wrestler, whether voluntarily or through coercion, to make them appear more popular or better despite whether the wrestler who benefits deserves it or not.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Random Rant Regarding Jesus

Okay. I don't know what specifically stirred this up, but I'm gonna go on a rant anyway. Maybe it's because I still haven't found a good church home (the one I'm going to...not working out) or whatever, but I'm tired of bullshit issues regarding my faith. I'm only an armchair theologian and a poor one at that, but here's what I know regarding Jesus:
- Jesus is not a Republican.
- Jesus is not a Democrat.
- Jesus loves gay people.
- Jesus loves people who make or watch porn.
- Jesus wants to console, not shame, those who have gotten an abortion.
- Jesus likes a good party (reference: water-to-wine at a wedding, various meals with his disciples).
- Jesus pities the delusional wealthy.
- Jesus pities the delusional.
- Jesus loves children.
- Jesus loves adults.
- Jesus loves the elderly.
- Jesus loves those who hate.
- Jesus was/is a misfit.
- Jesus hated the status quo.
- Jesus gave it to Caesar when it belonged to him.
- Jesus doesn't care about social status.
- Jesus doesn't care about whether you have stuff or don't have stuff.
- Jesus is crestfallen that many people treat themselves like their own God.
- Jesus knows that we all think of ourselves as our own God.
- Jesus is over it. Why are you clinging on to your guilt?
- Jesus doesn't care how you eat your cracker and drink your wine.
- Jesus loves those who don't believe he exists or is God.
- Jesus loves those who aren't sure if he exists or is God.
- Jesus loves those who think he is just a prophet.
- Jesus hates the concept that salvation and love is bought or earned.
- Jesus had to defecate like anyone else.
- Jesus tipped over the tables.
- Jesus didn't throw a stone.

I would have just stated, "Jesus loves" but that bumper sticker unfortunately lost a good chunk of weight a long time ago when it became a slogan instead of an example.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Barnes at the Movies: The Dark Knight...In IMAX!

Disclaimer: Let me warn all of you. This review is going to be pretty lengthy and not in a short bite like most of my movie reviews. No spoilers will be revealed, but at the same time I'll get into some story and character detail. I don't know if it is because of all that needs to shared about the film or the fact that I am a huge Batman fan (probably more of the latter), but this is going to be a haul. Grab a snack, a beverage, and use the restroom before reading. End Disclaimer.

Let me tell you about The Dark Knight. The Batman franchise was resurrected from the 1990's by Christopher Nolan, director and front runner of Memento and The Prestige (which if you haven't seen, stop reading and go to your local Blockbuster), in the form of Batman Begins. This film was yet another retelling of the Hamlet-esque story of the Batman. We have all heard/read/seen one version of it or another. Bruce Wayne's rich parents were murdered in front of his eyes in the back alley of a theater when he was eight years old. In the years that followed, the orphan dedicated his life to intense training and study, to live as a shadow on the side of justice, the Batman. The villains, the tone, and the quality of the storytelling has varied over the past seventy (yes, seventy) plus years of the character's existence, but the basic elements remain unchanged; the human body can alter it's muscle size, fat content, and skin tone, but it's skeletal structure remains the same.

Nolan, along with writer David Goyer and the cast of Batman Begins, created what many believe to be the quintessential Caped Crusader tale. Bruce Wayne studies various martial arts, the criminal mind, and various sciences throughout his life and returns back to Gotham to become a symbol that not only criminals fear, but inspires Gotham's other denizens to clean up and salvage their city from self destruction. The Batman was needed to weed out the mob which was infused into Gotham's societal infrastructure, to go places and commit actions no regular man would be able to do. To save you from reading two movie reviews, I'll just say pick this movie up and watch it before Dark Knight.

Now, onto the review as labeled. Nolan has jumped over the oh-so-typical sophomore hump/complaint of "well, it was good, but not as good as the original." Dark Knight did what sequels should always set out to do. It kept the elements from the original film, but enhanced and matured them. It also introduces new characters and conflicts without force-feeding them onto the viewer. Essentially, this film is on an elite list of sequels that not only are better than the original, but make you question whether or not you'll watch the first film ever again.

I will watch Batman Begins again on my DVD player in the future...but only to prep myself to watch Dark Knight on DVD immediately afterward.

Dark Knight continues Nolan's new Batman mythos shortly after Begins, in which Batman/Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) has become the symbol of hope for Gotham...however it is not without consequence. Copycat Batmen run wild in the city and with the mob in disarray they turn to a man in which they don't fully understand or trust, The Joker (the late Heath Ledger). Joker chokes Gotham into paranoia and fear, stating that his murders will cease once the Batman publicly unmasks.

Meanwhile, Bruce is still pining for his sweetheart, Rachel Dawes (Maggie Gyllenhaal) while she assists (and dates) new, straight-laced district attorney Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart). Believing that Dent could become a new, less-frightening face of justice in Gotham to replace the Batman, Wayne as himself and his alter-ego support Dent in his quest to clean up Gotham. Perhaps then the Batman would no longer be needed and Bruce can commit his life to being with Rachel.

The look of the film and color scheme is the same as the first film, however there are actually more scenes during daylight and brighter surroundings than the previous movie. However, this does not distract the audience from the dark tone of the content. Seeing this film in IMAX was a visual buffet. There are many shots of skyscrapers that took me out of my seat and into the film to the point that I wondered if I was going to fall and plummet to the streets below. The effects and CGI in the movie were well done, however if there was one nit-picky (and this is a tiny, tiny nit) complaint it would be that a certain villain in the film's face can take you out of the otherwise realistic world that Nolan has crafted.

The story is not really a Batman story. It's a ensemble story featuring Batman, Joker, and Harvey Dent as the main three. Batman/Bruce Wayne probably has the most screen time but by less than two minutes. The pacing of the movie is fantastic, there is never a moment in which the audience is bored or overly stimulated. The suspense takes the proper enough time to tease and mildly annoy the viewer without them getting pissed off or feel cheated. The fight scenes have vastly improved since the first film, having Nolan widening the space out and using less frantic camera work in order to see how the Batman takes down his opposition with cold calculation. The murders in the film are intense and the dialogue fits the characters, but I don't recall seeing any gore nor do I recall hearing any character swear in the film. In this day and age, it is very difficult to pull off a movie of this kind without at least a mayo jar filled with blood and the word "damn." With this story, I would debate that this movie falls more in the category of "crime film" than "comic book movie."

With the acting, I'll start with the less and move up toward the best. Maggie Gyllenhaal (whose last name I have trouble remembering how to pronounce verbally) does a better job as Rachel Dawes than Katie Holmes did in the first movie, but that doesn't say much. It's not that she did a bad job, but even in the first movie the character was a bit of an afterthought and seemed like a forced love interest that studios usually push on a film franchise with such a male-heavy cast. In this movie, her character isn't much different and there are other things going on that you care more than whether or not she'll choose to be with Bruce Wayne or Harvey Dent. She comes off as whiny and seems to flip on her damsel-in-distress switch and flip off back into her independent-female-assistant-district-attorney in mere seconds. Aside from influencing certain parts of the main characters' motivations, her character and presence seem largely irrelevant. More relevant than in the first film, but still not too important. Like asking for your burger to have extra lettuce. While I don't blame Gyllenhaal for her character to be written in this manner, her performance doesn't stand out to elevate her role in the film.

Michael Caine as Wayne's dry-witted and doting butler, Alfred Pennyworth, does a great job as always. Caine pulled it off once again and seems comfortable in his role as the comedic yet wise mentor to the young Master Bruce. His character seems to grow more and more important to Wayne as the franchise continues.

Morgan Freeman's role got a little bit fatter as Lucius Fox, the man in charge of Wayne Enterprises' day-to-day activities and technological genie for the Batman. Freeman's character gets a little bit more fleshed out than in the first movie and he has more interaction with Wayne and Batman aside from being the "less-I-know, less-I-tell" R&D man from the first film. Freeman does an excellent job but that's far from surprising.

Here's a side note: Random actors to look for in this film include Cillian Murphy, Anthony Michael Hall (yes, Breakfast Club's Anthony Michael Hall), Eric Roberts, and Nestor Carbonell (from the short-short lived live action The Tick television series). Enjoy.

Gary Oldman's role as Lt. James Gordon, Batman's greatest ally and police connection, is greatly increased and is used much more efficiently than in the first film. Oldman's performance adequately conveys the character's weary yet determined demeanor. Oldman understands that he needs to display Gordon as a compassionate, gentle man forced to put up a stone-hearted front much of the time. Oldman's performance doesn't disappoint and is important to the franchise's future. The relationship between Gordon and Batman gets more complex when the film comes to a close.

If it weren't for Heath Ledger's performance (more on that later) there would be more praise for Aaron Eckhart's performance as Harvey Dent. Eckhart is relatively unknown to most casual movie fans, or is known in that all to often "I've seen him in something before, what was it...shoot, this is gonna bug me the rest of the day" context. Unless you count his role in the comedy Thank You for Smoking as his breakthrough performance (which I don't, sorry), Eckhart will be known to most of the public as Harvey Dent. Eckhart does a good job portraying the dedicated and morally tested Dent, along with performing as...well, that'd be telling. While throughout 3/4ths of the film, I thought his character was used brilliantly, I was surprised on his character's future at the end of the film. I like what they are doing/did, but at the same time it leaves many questions open which unfortunately probably won't involve the character.

Christian Bale will be considered by many to be the top face behind the cowl of Batman. Bale is much skinnier this time around (probably because of his super-diet for Rescue Dawn) and claiming that Batman needed more focus on speed than power. Bale is able to consistently keep the Batman and Bruce Wayne as both separate characters in the same body. This time around, Batman/Bruce feels like he has bitten off more than he can chew and is unsure on whether or not Batman is truly what Gotham needs. Is the Batman lancing Gotham's boils or just opening them up to invite a more sinister infection? Bale is able to keep this uncertainty and uneasiness within his character and facial expressions even during the action scenes.

Now unto Heath Ledger as the Joker. Before the movie came out, many interviews with the cast and many film critics praised him for his performance. I was skeptical. I always am whenever the press fawns over actors/actresses, especially if they make a "brave choice" or the film was the performer's last full piece of work. "Oh, Nicole Kidman wore a fake nose in The Hours, she's so daring!" "One has to watch Street Fighter to witness Raul Julia's final performance."

Frankly, I was originally concerned about hearing Ledger's name when it was announced for the Joker role. I admit, he was good in Brokeback Mountain (you know, the gay cowboy movie), however nothing else was outstanding. The main movies he was known for before that one were 10 Things I Hate About You as a dreamy slob turned hunk, Mel Gibson's son in the Braveheart-wannabe The Patriot, and in A Knight's Tale as...well, a knight. A knight that rocks out to Queen. Doesn't sound like much to work with or reference to for a major villain role. I hate to say this, but the hype is right and I am wrong. The Joker captivated me the whole way.

The Joker's role in the Batman mythos is jumbled and hard to explain to the uninitiated. In the comics, his origin is sketchy at best. He is a failed comedian turned to crime..or is he an unknown mob henchman that fell into a vat of acid and became insane...he could be Batman's parents' killer...maybe a criminal named Jack Napier...might be just some psychopath that needs attention... maybe some of those together...maybe all of them together...maybe none...I give up. The Joker's story of how he became the Joker and life before being the Joker is a mystery that even Batman has not solved.

Because of this and other reasons, there have been many interpretations on how to present the character on the screen. In the 1960's TV series, Caesar Romero's Joker was slap happy and wacky, often more concerned out of getting a laugh out at Gotham's expense and make a quick buck than actually causing serious damage. 1989's Batman had Jack Nicholson play the Joker like...well, Jack Nicholson having fun being a sadistic clown. Mark Hamill (Luke Skywalker himself) had much praise as the Joker in the 1990's Batman: The Animated Series depicting a bipolar groan-inducing comic that seems to want to make Batman smile more than kill him...but not by much.

If Nolan and Ledger's take the Joker were put in the same room with the other interpretations of Joker, the other Jokers would either flee in fear...or be killed. The other Jokers were snappy dressers wearing bright, vibrant colors and pastels. Ledger's Joker's clothing is drab, wrinkled, and dirty. Other Jokers stand upright, make wild body movements, speak very vibrantly, and have constant toothy grins. Ledger's Joker is slumped over, moves mostly to act not to posture, speaks calmly and directly most of the time, and smiles mostly because...well, it's permanently carved into his face. Unlike past Jokers there are no stories of acid changing his hair color and skin complexion, nor clown gimmicks like lethally electric joy-buzzers or corsages shooting acid. In its place is a sloppily painted maw, stringy green-blond hair, and pockets filled with knives and grenades. Ledger's acting reminded me more of some of my clients that I worked with as a mental health social worker than the over-the-top buffoon madman that is usually seen. Think John Wayne Gacy rather than a mischief-making Bozo.

Ledger's Joker is three parts psychopath, two parts terrorist, one part criminal genius, and a pinch of a jester. I cannot recall a character in which I would laugh out loud at his behavior in one moment and in the next moment be legitimately terrified. The Joker is a man who considers murder as natural as breathing. As Batman is a symbol of hope, order, and harmony, the Joker is a symbol of despair, chaos, and mass hysteria. Ying and Yang. In many interviews, the crew and cast stated that Ledger kept a "Joker Diary" (which I like to call "Ledger's Ledger") writing down thoughts in character. I'd love to read some of it to see what else this Joker thinks. I'm not going to say "Ledger is going to get a posthumous Oscar nomination" because there are still six months worth of films to be released. However, this is by far Ledger's best performance and it has and will be immortalized for the years to come.

Now I am not going to give out the actual ending. That would ruin it for you. However, I will say one thing.

Joker wins.

I highly recommend that you watch this movie. It is one of the best films I've seen in a long time and I saw a lot of good movies this year. In fact, I think I'm going to see it again in the theater and I usually don't like to spend the money to do that. You will thank me for it and I want to see if you agree with my viewpoint of the ending. Why so serious? Go have a Dark Knight.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Preparing for the Dark Knight

List of what I will do/have done this week in preparation for the Dark Knight in IMAX this Friday.
- Play all episodes of Batman: The Animated Series on my DVD player.
- View the 1960's Batman: The Movie with commentary from Adam West and Burt Ward!
- Read Batman: Year One
- Read The Dark Knight Returns
- Read The Dark Knight Strikes Again (Yeah, I know it's not nearly as good as the first.)
- Obtain my 50th Batman action figure for my Batman Shrine (I know,I'm a little sick in the head.)
- Try to find/obtain a DVD with the original 1940's Batman film serials featuring Batman and Robin fighting The Wizard!
- Go to Barnes and Noble and skim through "Batman and Philosophy"
- Do the Batusi!
- Read Batman: The Long Halloween
- Read Batman: Dark Victory
- Believe in Harvey Dent
- Watch 1989's Batman
-
Read Batman: The Killing Joke (featuring a possible origin of the Joker)
- Read all my current issues of All Star Batman and Robin
- Watch Batman: Mask of the Phantasm
-
Watch Batman Begins (naturally)
- Recite the words "And Bill Finger" when reading "Batman created by Bob Kane" on film credits and in the books

Why so serious? Review of Dark Knight next week.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Barnes at the Movies: Hellboy 2 - The Golden Army

For those of you who didn't watch the first Hellboy (which is a shame because you'd probably should), it is yet another movie based off of a successful comic book franchise. In the 1940's, the Nazis performed a summoning that was thwarted by the Allies, but not without something coming from the portal to the underworld. It was a baby demon with a large right hand made of stone. The demon was taken in and raised in the U.S. military. The troops gave him a name. They called him Hellboy. Now, Hellboy and those like him serve in the ultra classified Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense, an organization that...well, let me steal a line from the first movie: "There are things that bump in the night. We are the ones who bump back." The film introduced Hellboy along with his teammates. First, Abraham Sapien, a telepathic fish man, and Elizabeth Sherman, an unstable pyrokinetic and Hellboy's love interest. I'll let you fill in the rest of the details by watching it.

Hellboy 2 starts off with a legend that long ago of the kingdoms of humankind and the mythical waged war upon each other. After many battles, the Woodland King of the mythical raised the the Golden Army, an unstoppable force that nearly destroyed all of mankind, with his crown being the controlling force behind the army. Deciding that the Golden Army was too powerful, the King split his crown into three pieces, giving one of the pieces to mankind in exchange for a truce. Man would keep the land and the mythical would keep the forests. Years and years later, when humankind's piece of the crown is stolen during an artifact auction, the B.P.R.D. is on the case.

Hellboy (Ron Perlman) and Elizabeth (Selma Blair) going through a rough patch in their relationship, much like any couple would when they move in together...only involving a firestarter and a demon that loves Baby Ruths and cats. Meanwhile, Abe Sapien (Doug Jones) longs for companionship and understanding while B.P.R.D. director, Tom Manning (the hilarious and wonderful Jeffrey Tambor) is trying to keep Hellboy in check and out of the public eye. In light of Hellboy's constant insubordination, Manning brings in B.P.R.D. European associate named Johann Kraus (voiced by Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane), an ectoplasmic medium trapped in a containment suit, to lead the team and follow protocol. Can the misfits get their act together and protect mankind from the threat of the Golden Army's resurrection?

The movie is just as good as the first, however it travels more to the weird creatures than ghosts, demonic creatures, and the undead that dominated the first one. Director Guillermo Del Toro sculpts a grand world full of imaginative abominations. Del Toro's team did a great job mixing both CGI and costuming together to mesh and mold each monster. The look of the film is more like Del Toro's often praised Pan's Labyrinth than the first Hellboy. The scene in the Troll's Market is reminiscent of the now-classic Cantina scene in the original Star Wars in regards to it's plethora of busy-body creatures.

Ron Perlman makes Hellboy his own with his wiseguy delivery; imagine John McClane from Die Hard looking like Tim Curry from Legend. Doug Jones does a great job being Abe, lending his voice now that David Hyde Pierce abandoned the role he took in the first film. Selma Blair delivers as Liz and is used much better than in the first movie. The stand-out is Seth MacFarlane who has spot on delivery as Johann with both his German accent and being able to deliver his lines, comedic or otherwise, without sounding too cartoony like his...well, cartoon.

The film's themes continue from the first movie. The themes of being different and the desire to be accepted, along with the debate of fate versus choice. Hellboy, mind you, is supposed to bring the destruction of the world. His true name is Ahnung Un Rama (Son of the Fallen One), you know. He is destined to damn us, but as of now, chooses to help mankind. These themes are touched upon in this film and leaves room for possible growth (possible foreshadowing) if there is a third movie.

Despite the dark, grotesque look of the film, Hellboy 2 is mostly lighthearted and fun...and it oddly fits. Much like the characters in the film, it looks scary, but is friendly once you get acquainted. If you want a decent story, love monsters, and like good action, check it out.

Oh, and there is a great scene featuring Barry Manilow's "I Can't Smile Without You." Enjoy.