So the other night I called and spoke with my brother-from-another-mother, Rich, who is as big of a wrestling fanboy dork as I am. We were reminiscing while watching Monday Night RAW on our respective TV's in Orlando and Athens. "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan was on TV (who always entertains me by his goofball antics, chants of "U-S-A!", and the fact his name is "Hacksaw" but he carries a 2x4 wooden board instead of the cutting implement) about to wrestle and we discussed about the time we shared a beer with him at a tavern after an independent wrestling show a few years ago.
Rich and I walked in the bar and many wrestlers from the show were there. They were all very friendly and cordial, especially since Rich and I just had regular "bar-talk" instead of the typical "remember back in when you were in WWE" talk that they usually get from fans. We sat at the bar and spoke with good ol' "Hacksaw" for a few minutes. He was a jolly gentleman and had the thickest pair of glasses I have ever seen. I think they were made out of 4-inch thick bulletproof glass. He politely excused himself because he wanted to "talk to the purty gurls." What? He didn't want to waste his free time with two large, bearded men-children? I then went to speak with B.G. James and Tracy Brooks while Rich was elsewhere. Rich and I then departed.
Now, I told you this story to tell you about this one. As Rich and I were reminiscing about that moment, he stated, "Yeah, Hacksaw was a cool guy until he lied to that kid."
"What?"
"You don't remember?"
"When was this?"
"You were there!"
"All I remember was his funny glasses and his golly-garsh perviness for women half his age."
"He lied to a kid."
"I was talking to B.G. James and Tracy."
"Oh, what happened was that a dad and a kid walked into the bar. The kid walked over to me and asked if I was Duggan (side note: Rich is 6'5" and is a large man like myself, so it's not surprising for the uninitiated to think he or I were wrestlers.), to which I corrected him and pointed to 'Hacksaw.'"
"Okay..."
"Anyway, the kid chats with Duggan who saw the whole incident, I guess he felt a little insulted, and the kid asks if you and I were wrestlers."
"Right.."
"Duggan then states that we were a new tag team and were going to be on WWE in a few weeks."
"What?"
"Yeah, so he lied to a kid. I can't believe you missed that."
"No, no, no, Rich. He didn't lie to the kid."
"What?"
"No. Think positively. Duggan wasn't lying to the kid. 'Hacksaw' put us over."*
"(Laughter) He did!"
"I'm going to write a blog about this."
"I'm going to have to read it."
So that is how I was put over by "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan without even wrestling him or knowing about it. True American.
*- Put over: verb, wrestling slang- To endorse a fellow wrestler, whether voluntarily or through coercion, to make them appear more popular or better despite whether the wrestler who benefits deserves it or not.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Monday, July 21, 2008
Random Rant Regarding Jesus
Okay. I don't know what specifically stirred this up, but I'm gonna go on a rant anyway. Maybe it's because I still haven't found a good church home (the one I'm going to...not working out) or whatever, but I'm tired of bullshit issues regarding my faith. I'm only an armchair theologian and a poor one at that, but here's what I know regarding Jesus:
- Jesus is not a Republican.
- Jesus is not a Democrat.
- Jesus loves gay people.
- Jesus loves people who make or watch porn.
- Jesus wants to console, not shame, those who have gotten an abortion.
- Jesus likes a good party (reference: water-to-wine at a wedding, various meals with his disciples).
- Jesus pities the delusional wealthy.
- Jesus pities the delusional.
- Jesus loves children.
- Jesus loves adults.
- Jesus loves the elderly.
- Jesus loves those who hate.
- Jesus was/is a misfit.
- Jesus hated the status quo.
- Jesus gave it to Caesar when it belonged to him.
- Jesus doesn't care about social status.
- Jesus doesn't care about whether you have stuff or don't have stuff.
- Jesus is crestfallen that many people treat themselves like their own God.
- Jesus knows that we all think of ourselves as our own God.
- Jesus is over it. Why are you clinging on to your guilt?
- Jesus doesn't care how you eat your cracker and drink your wine.
- Jesus loves those who don't believe he exists or is God.
- Jesus loves those who aren't sure if he exists or is God.
- Jesus loves those who think he is just a prophet.
- Jesus hates the concept that salvation and love is bought or earned.
- Jesus had to defecate like anyone else.
- Jesus tipped over the tables.
- Jesus didn't throw a stone.
I would have just stated, "Jesus loves" but that bumper sticker unfortunately lost a good chunk of weight a long time ago when it became a slogan instead of an example.
- Jesus is not a Republican.
- Jesus is not a Democrat.
- Jesus loves gay people.
- Jesus loves people who make or watch porn.
- Jesus wants to console, not shame, those who have gotten an abortion.
- Jesus likes a good party (reference: water-to-wine at a wedding, various meals with his disciples).
- Jesus pities the delusional wealthy.
- Jesus pities the delusional.
- Jesus loves children.
- Jesus loves adults.
- Jesus loves the elderly.
- Jesus loves those who hate.
- Jesus was/is a misfit.
- Jesus hated the status quo.
- Jesus gave it to Caesar when it belonged to him.
- Jesus doesn't care about social status.
- Jesus doesn't care about whether you have stuff or don't have stuff.
- Jesus is crestfallen that many people treat themselves like their own God.
- Jesus knows that we all think of ourselves as our own God.
- Jesus is over it. Why are you clinging on to your guilt?
- Jesus doesn't care how you eat your cracker and drink your wine.
- Jesus loves those who don't believe he exists or is God.
- Jesus loves those who aren't sure if he exists or is God.
- Jesus loves those who think he is just a prophet.
- Jesus hates the concept that salvation and love is bought or earned.
- Jesus had to defecate like anyone else.
- Jesus tipped over the tables.
- Jesus didn't throw a stone.
I would have just stated, "Jesus loves" but that bumper sticker unfortunately lost a good chunk of weight a long time ago when it became a slogan instead of an example.
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Barnes at the Movies: The Dark Knight...In IMAX!
Disclaimer: Let me warn all of you. This review is going to be pretty lengthy and not in a short bite like most of my movie reviews. No spoilers will be revealed, but at the same time I'll get into some story and character detail. I don't know if it is because of all that needs to shared about the film or the fact that I am a huge Batman fan (probably more of the latter), but this is going to be a haul. Grab a snack, a beverage, and use the restroom before reading. End Disclaimer.
Let me tell you about The Dark Knight. The Batman franchise was resurrected from the 1990's by Christopher Nolan, director and front runner of Memento and The Prestige (which if you haven't seen, stop reading and go to your local Blockbuster), in the form of Batman Begins. This film was yet another retelling of the Hamlet-esque story of the Batman. We have all heard/read/seen one version of it or another. Bruce Wayne's rich parents were murdered in front of his eyes in the back alley of a theater when he was eight years old. In the years that followed, the orphan dedicated his life to intense training and study, to live as a shadow on the side of justice, the Batman. The villains, the tone, and the quality of the storytelling has varied over the past seventy (yes, seventy) plus years of the character's existence, but the basic elements remain unchanged; the human body can alter it's muscle size, fat content, and skin tone, but it's skeletal structure remains the same.
Nolan, along with writer David Goyer and the cast of Batman Begins, created what many believe to be the quintessential Caped Crusader tale. Bruce Wayne studies various martial arts, the criminal mind, and various sciences throughout his life and returns back to Gotham to become a symbol that not only criminals fear, but inspires Gotham's other denizens to clean up and salvage their city from self destruction. The Batman was needed to weed out the mob which was infused into Gotham's societal infrastructure, to go places and commit actions no regular man would be able to do. To save you from reading two movie reviews, I'll just say pick this movie up and watch it before Dark Knight.
Now, onto the review as labeled. Nolan has jumped over the oh-so-typical sophomore hump/complaint of "well, it was good, but not as good as the original." Dark Knight did what sequels should always set out to do. It kept the elements from the original film, but enhanced and matured them. It also introduces new characters and conflicts without force-feeding them onto the viewer. Essentially, this film is on an elite list of sequels that not only are better than the original, but make you question whether or not you'll watch the first film ever again.
I will watch Batman Begins again on my DVD player in the future...but only to prep myself to watch Dark Knight on DVD immediately afterward.
Dark Knight continues Nolan's new Batman mythos shortly after Begins, in which Batman/Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) has become the symbol of hope for Gotham...however it is not without consequence. Copycat Batmen run wild in the city and with the mob in disarray they turn to a man in which they don't fully understand or trust, The Joker (the late Heath Ledger). Joker chokes Gotham into paranoia and fear, stating that his murders will cease once the Batman publicly unmasks.
Meanwhile, Bruce is still pining for his sweetheart, Rachel Dawes (Maggie Gyllenhaal) while she assists (and dates) new, straight-laced district attorney Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart). Believing that Dent could become a new, less-frightening face of justice in Gotham to replace the Batman, Wayne as himself and his alter-ego support Dent in his quest to clean up Gotham. Perhaps then the Batman would no longer be needed and Bruce can commit his life to being with Rachel.
The look of the film and color scheme is the same as the first film, however there are actually more scenes during daylight and brighter surroundings than the previous movie. However, this does not distract the audience from the dark tone of the content. Seeing this film in IMAX was a visual buffet. There are many shots of skyscrapers that took me out of my seat and into the film to the point that I wondered if I was going to fall and plummet to the streets below. The effects and CGI in the movie were well done, however if there was one nit-picky (and this is a tiny, tiny nit) complaint it would be that a certain villain in the film's face can take you out of the otherwise realistic world that Nolan has crafted.
The story is not really a Batman story. It's a ensemble story featuring Batman, Joker, and Harvey Dent as the main three. Batman/Bruce Wayne probably has the most screen time but by less than two minutes. The pacing of the movie is fantastic, there is never a moment in which the audience is bored or overly stimulated. The suspense takes the proper enough time to tease and mildly annoy the viewer without them getting pissed off or feel cheated. The fight scenes have vastly improved since the first film, having Nolan widening the space out and using less frantic camera work in order to see how the Batman takes down his opposition with cold calculation. The murders in the film are intense and the dialogue fits the characters, but I don't recall seeing any gore nor do I recall hearing any character swear in the film. In this day and age, it is very difficult to pull off a movie of this kind without at least a mayo jar filled with blood and the word "damn." With this story, I would debate that this movie falls more in the category of "crime film" than "comic book movie."
With the acting, I'll start with the less and move up toward the best. Maggie Gyllenhaal (whose last name I have trouble remembering how to pronounce verbally) does a better job as Rachel Dawes than Katie Holmes did in the first movie, but that doesn't say much. It's not that she did a bad job, but even in the first movie the character was a bit of an afterthought and seemed like a forced love interest that studios usually push on a film franchise with such a male-heavy cast. In this movie, her character isn't much different and there are other things going on that you care more than whether or not she'll choose to be with Bruce Wayne or Harvey Dent. She comes off as whiny and seems to flip on her damsel-in-distress switch and flip off back into her independent-female-assistant-district-attorney in mere seconds. Aside from influencing certain parts of the main characters' motivations, her character and presence seem largely irrelevant. More relevant than in the first film, but still not too important. Like asking for your burger to have extra lettuce. While I don't blame Gyllenhaal for her character to be written in this manner, her performance doesn't stand out to elevate her role in the film.
Michael Caine as Wayne's dry-witted and doting butler, Alfred Pennyworth, does a great job as always. Caine pulled it off once again and seems comfortable in his role as the comedic yet wise mentor to the young Master Bruce. His character seems to grow more and more important to Wayne as the franchise continues.
Morgan Freeman's role got a little bit fatter as Lucius Fox, the man in charge of Wayne Enterprises' day-to-day activities and technological genie for the Batman. Freeman's character gets a little bit more fleshed out than in the first movie and he has more interaction with Wayne and Batman aside from being the "less-I-know, less-I-tell" R&D man from the first film. Freeman does an excellent job but that's far from surprising.
Here's a side note: Random actors to look for in this film include Cillian Murphy, Anthony Michael Hall (yes, Breakfast Club's Anthony Michael Hall), Eric Roberts, and Nestor Carbonell (from the short-short lived live action The Tick television series). Enjoy.
Gary Oldman's role as Lt. James Gordon, Batman's greatest ally and police connection, is greatly increased and is used much more efficiently than in the first film. Oldman's performance adequately conveys the character's weary yet determined demeanor. Oldman understands that he needs to display Gordon as a compassionate, gentle man forced to put up a stone-hearted front much of the time. Oldman's performance doesn't disappoint and is important to the franchise's future. The relationship between Gordon and Batman gets more complex when the film comes to a close.
If it weren't for Heath Ledger's performance (more on that later) there would be more praise for Aaron Eckhart's performance as Harvey Dent. Eckhart is relatively unknown to most casual movie fans, or is known in that all to often "I've seen him in something before, what was it...shoot, this is gonna bug me the rest of the day" context. Unless you count his role in the comedy Thank You for Smoking as his breakthrough performance (which I don't, sorry), Eckhart will be known to most of the public as Harvey Dent. Eckhart does a good job portraying the dedicated and morally tested Dent, along with performing as...well, that'd be telling. While throughout 3/4ths of the film, I thought his character was used brilliantly, I was surprised on his character's future at the end of the film. I like what they are doing/did, but at the same time it leaves many questions open which unfortunately probably won't involve the character.
Christian Bale will be considered by many to be the top face behind the cowl of Batman. Bale is much skinnier this time around (probably because of his super-diet for Rescue Dawn) and claiming that Batman needed more focus on speed than power. Bale is able to consistently keep the Batman and Bruce Wayne as both separate characters in the same body. This time around, Batman/Bruce feels like he has bitten off more than he can chew and is unsure on whether or not Batman is truly what Gotham needs. Is the Batman lancing Gotham's boils or just opening them up to invite a more sinister infection? Bale is able to keep this uncertainty and uneasiness within his character and facial expressions even during the action scenes.
Now unto Heath Ledger as the Joker. Before the movie came out, many interviews with the cast and many film critics praised him for his performance. I was skeptical. I always am whenever the press fawns over actors/actresses, especially if they make a "brave choice" or the film was the performer's last full piece of work. "Oh, Nicole Kidman wore a fake nose in The Hours, she's so daring!" "One has to watch Street Fighter to witness Raul Julia's final performance."
Frankly, I was originally concerned about hearing Ledger's name when it was announced for the Joker role. I admit, he was good in Brokeback Mountain (you know, the gay cowboy movie), however nothing else was outstanding. The main movies he was known for before that one were 10 Things I Hate About You as a dreamy slob turned hunk, Mel Gibson's son in the Braveheart-wannabe The Patriot, and in A Knight's Tale as...well, a knight. A knight that rocks out to Queen. Doesn't sound like much to work with or reference to for a major villain role. I hate to say this, but the hype is right and I am wrong. The Joker captivated me the whole way.
The Joker's role in the Batman mythos is jumbled and hard to explain to the uninitiated. In the comics, his origin is sketchy at best. He is a failed comedian turned to crime..or is he an unknown mob henchman that fell into a vat of acid and became insane...he could be Batman's parents' killer...maybe a criminal named Jack Napier...might be just some psychopath that needs attention... maybe some of those together...maybe all of them together...maybe none...I give up. The Joker's story of how he became the Joker and life before being the Joker is a mystery that even Batman has not solved.
Because of this and other reasons, there have been many interpretations on how to present the character on the screen. In the 1960's TV series, Caesar Romero's Joker was slap happy and wacky, often more concerned out of getting a laugh out at Gotham's expense and make a quick buck than actually causing serious damage. 1989's Batman had Jack Nicholson play the Joker like...well, Jack Nicholson having fun being a sadistic clown. Mark Hamill (Luke Skywalker himself) had much praise as the Joker in the 1990's Batman: The Animated Series depicting a bipolar groan-inducing comic that seems to want to make Batman smile more than kill him...but not by much.
If Nolan and Ledger's take the Joker were put in the same room with the other interpretations of Joker, the other Jokers would either flee in fear...or be killed. The other Jokers were snappy dressers wearing bright, vibrant colors and pastels. Ledger's Joker's clothing is drab, wrinkled, and dirty. Other Jokers stand upright, make wild body movements, speak very vibrantly, and have constant toothy grins. Ledger's Joker is slumped over, moves mostly to act not to posture, speaks calmly and directly most of the time, and smiles mostly because...well, it's permanently carved into his face. Unlike past Jokers there are no stories of acid changing his hair color and skin complexion, nor clown gimmicks like lethally electric joy-buzzers or corsages shooting acid. In its place is a sloppily painted maw, stringy green-blond hair, and pockets filled with knives and grenades. Ledger's acting reminded me more of some of my clients that I worked with as a mental health social worker than the over-the-top buffoon madman that is usually seen. Think John Wayne Gacy rather than a mischief-making Bozo.
Ledger's Joker is three parts psychopath, two parts terrorist, one part criminal genius, and a pinch of a jester. I cannot recall a character in which I would laugh out loud at his behavior in one moment and in the next moment be legitimately terrified. The Joker is a man who considers murder as natural as breathing. As Batman is a symbol of hope, order, and harmony, the Joker is a symbol of despair, chaos, and mass hysteria. Ying and Yang. In many interviews, the crew and cast stated that Ledger kept a "Joker Diary" (which I like to call "Ledger's Ledger") writing down thoughts in character. I'd love to read some of it to see what else this Joker thinks. I'm not going to say "Ledger is going to get a posthumous Oscar nomination" because there are still six months worth of films to be released. However, this is by far Ledger's best performance and it has and will be immortalized for the years to come.
Now I am not going to give out the actual ending. That would ruin it for you. However, I will say one thing.
Joker wins.
I highly recommend that you watch this movie. It is one of the best films I've seen in a long time and I saw a lot of good movies this year. In fact, I think I'm going to see it again in the theater and I usually don't like to spend the money to do that. You will thank me for it and I want to see if you agree with my viewpoint of the ending. Why so serious? Go have a Dark Knight.
Let me tell you about The Dark Knight. The Batman franchise was resurrected from the 1990's by Christopher Nolan, director and front runner of Memento and The Prestige (which if you haven't seen, stop reading and go to your local Blockbuster), in the form of Batman Begins. This film was yet another retelling of the Hamlet-esque story of the Batman. We have all heard/read/seen one version of it or another. Bruce Wayne's rich parents were murdered in front of his eyes in the back alley of a theater when he was eight years old. In the years that followed, the orphan dedicated his life to intense training and study, to live as a shadow on the side of justice, the Batman. The villains, the tone, and the quality of the storytelling has varied over the past seventy (yes, seventy) plus years of the character's existence, but the basic elements remain unchanged; the human body can alter it's muscle size, fat content, and skin tone, but it's skeletal structure remains the same.
Nolan, along with writer David Goyer and the cast of Batman Begins, created what many believe to be the quintessential Caped Crusader tale. Bruce Wayne studies various martial arts, the criminal mind, and various sciences throughout his life and returns back to Gotham to become a symbol that not only criminals fear, but inspires Gotham's other denizens to clean up and salvage their city from self destruction. The Batman was needed to weed out the mob which was infused into Gotham's societal infrastructure, to go places and commit actions no regular man would be able to do. To save you from reading two movie reviews, I'll just say pick this movie up and watch it before Dark Knight.
Now, onto the review as labeled. Nolan has jumped over the oh-so-typical sophomore hump/complaint of "well, it was good, but not as good as the original." Dark Knight did what sequels should always set out to do. It kept the elements from the original film, but enhanced and matured them. It also introduces new characters and conflicts without force-feeding them onto the viewer. Essentially, this film is on an elite list of sequels that not only are better than the original, but make you question whether or not you'll watch the first film ever again.
I will watch Batman Begins again on my DVD player in the future...but only to prep myself to watch Dark Knight on DVD immediately afterward.
Dark Knight continues Nolan's new Batman mythos shortly after Begins, in which Batman/Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) has become the symbol of hope for Gotham...however it is not without consequence. Copycat Batmen run wild in the city and with the mob in disarray they turn to a man in which they don't fully understand or trust, The Joker (the late Heath Ledger). Joker chokes Gotham into paranoia and fear, stating that his murders will cease once the Batman publicly unmasks.
Meanwhile, Bruce is still pining for his sweetheart, Rachel Dawes (Maggie Gyllenhaal) while she assists (and dates) new, straight-laced district attorney Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart). Believing that Dent could become a new, less-frightening face of justice in Gotham to replace the Batman, Wayne as himself and his alter-ego support Dent in his quest to clean up Gotham. Perhaps then the Batman would no longer be needed and Bruce can commit his life to being with Rachel.
The look of the film and color scheme is the same as the first film, however there are actually more scenes during daylight and brighter surroundings than the previous movie. However, this does not distract the audience from the dark tone of the content. Seeing this film in IMAX was a visual buffet. There are many shots of skyscrapers that took me out of my seat and into the film to the point that I wondered if I was going to fall and plummet to the streets below. The effects and CGI in the movie were well done, however if there was one nit-picky (and this is a tiny, tiny nit) complaint it would be that a certain villain in the film's face can take you out of the otherwise realistic world that Nolan has crafted.
The story is not really a Batman story. It's a ensemble story featuring Batman, Joker, and Harvey Dent as the main three. Batman/Bruce Wayne probably has the most screen time but by less than two minutes. The pacing of the movie is fantastic, there is never a moment in which the audience is bored or overly stimulated. The suspense takes the proper enough time to tease and mildly annoy the viewer without them getting pissed off or feel cheated. The fight scenes have vastly improved since the first film, having Nolan widening the space out and using less frantic camera work in order to see how the Batman takes down his opposition with cold calculation. The murders in the film are intense and the dialogue fits the characters, but I don't recall seeing any gore nor do I recall hearing any character swear in the film. In this day and age, it is very difficult to pull off a movie of this kind without at least a mayo jar filled with blood and the word "damn." With this story, I would debate that this movie falls more in the category of "crime film" than "comic book movie."
With the acting, I'll start with the less and move up toward the best. Maggie Gyllenhaal (whose last name I have trouble remembering how to pronounce verbally) does a better job as Rachel Dawes than Katie Holmes did in the first movie, but that doesn't say much. It's not that she did a bad job, but even in the first movie the character was a bit of an afterthought and seemed like a forced love interest that studios usually push on a film franchise with such a male-heavy cast. In this movie, her character isn't much different and there are other things going on that you care more than whether or not she'll choose to be with Bruce Wayne or Harvey Dent. She comes off as whiny and seems to flip on her damsel-in-distress switch and flip off back into her independent-female-assistant-district-attorney in mere seconds. Aside from influencing certain parts of the main characters' motivations, her character and presence seem largely irrelevant. More relevant than in the first film, but still not too important. Like asking for your burger to have extra lettuce. While I don't blame Gyllenhaal for her character to be written in this manner, her performance doesn't stand out to elevate her role in the film.
Michael Caine as Wayne's dry-witted and doting butler, Alfred Pennyworth, does a great job as always. Caine pulled it off once again and seems comfortable in his role as the comedic yet wise mentor to the young Master Bruce. His character seems to grow more and more important to Wayne as the franchise continues.
Morgan Freeman's role got a little bit fatter as Lucius Fox, the man in charge of Wayne Enterprises' day-to-day activities and technological genie for the Batman. Freeman's character gets a little bit more fleshed out than in the first movie and he has more interaction with Wayne and Batman aside from being the "less-I-know, less-I-tell" R&D man from the first film. Freeman does an excellent job but that's far from surprising.
Here's a side note: Random actors to look for in this film include Cillian Murphy, Anthony Michael Hall (yes, Breakfast Club's Anthony Michael Hall), Eric Roberts, and Nestor Carbonell (from the short-short lived live action The Tick television series). Enjoy.
Gary Oldman's role as Lt. James Gordon, Batman's greatest ally and police connection, is greatly increased and is used much more efficiently than in the first film. Oldman's performance adequately conveys the character's weary yet determined demeanor. Oldman understands that he needs to display Gordon as a compassionate, gentle man forced to put up a stone-hearted front much of the time. Oldman's performance doesn't disappoint and is important to the franchise's future. The relationship between Gordon and Batman gets more complex when the film comes to a close.
If it weren't for Heath Ledger's performance (more on that later) there would be more praise for Aaron Eckhart's performance as Harvey Dent. Eckhart is relatively unknown to most casual movie fans, or is known in that all to often "I've seen him in something before, what was it...shoot, this is gonna bug me the rest of the day" context. Unless you count his role in the comedy Thank You for Smoking as his breakthrough performance (which I don't, sorry), Eckhart will be known to most of the public as Harvey Dent. Eckhart does a good job portraying the dedicated and morally tested Dent, along with performing as...well, that'd be telling. While throughout 3/4ths of the film, I thought his character was used brilliantly, I was surprised on his character's future at the end of the film. I like what they are doing/did, but at the same time it leaves many questions open which unfortunately probably won't involve the character.
Christian Bale will be considered by many to be the top face behind the cowl of Batman. Bale is much skinnier this time around (probably because of his super-diet for Rescue Dawn) and claiming that Batman needed more focus on speed than power. Bale is able to consistently keep the Batman and Bruce Wayne as both separate characters in the same body. This time around, Batman/Bruce feels like he has bitten off more than he can chew and is unsure on whether or not Batman is truly what Gotham needs. Is the Batman lancing Gotham's boils or just opening them up to invite a more sinister infection? Bale is able to keep this uncertainty and uneasiness within his character and facial expressions even during the action scenes.
Now unto Heath Ledger as the Joker. Before the movie came out, many interviews with the cast and many film critics praised him for his performance. I was skeptical. I always am whenever the press fawns over actors/actresses, especially if they make a "brave choice" or the film was the performer's last full piece of work. "Oh, Nicole Kidman wore a fake nose in The Hours, she's so daring!" "One has to watch Street Fighter to witness Raul Julia's final performance."
Frankly, I was originally concerned about hearing Ledger's name when it was announced for the Joker role. I admit, he was good in Brokeback Mountain (you know, the gay cowboy movie), however nothing else was outstanding. The main movies he was known for before that one were 10 Things I Hate About You as a dreamy slob turned hunk, Mel Gibson's son in the Braveheart-wannabe The Patriot, and in A Knight's Tale as...well, a knight. A knight that rocks out to Queen. Doesn't sound like much to work with or reference to for a major villain role. I hate to say this, but the hype is right and I am wrong. The Joker captivated me the whole way.
The Joker's role in the Batman mythos is jumbled and hard to explain to the uninitiated. In the comics, his origin is sketchy at best. He is a failed comedian turned to crime..or is he an unknown mob henchman that fell into a vat of acid and became insane...he could be Batman's parents' killer...maybe a criminal named Jack Napier...might be just some psychopath that needs attention... maybe some of those together...maybe all of them together...maybe none...I give up. The Joker's story of how he became the Joker and life before being the Joker is a mystery that even Batman has not solved.
Because of this and other reasons, there have been many interpretations on how to present the character on the screen. In the 1960's TV series, Caesar Romero's Joker was slap happy and wacky, often more concerned out of getting a laugh out at Gotham's expense and make a quick buck than actually causing serious damage. 1989's Batman had Jack Nicholson play the Joker like...well, Jack Nicholson having fun being a sadistic clown. Mark Hamill (Luke Skywalker himself) had much praise as the Joker in the 1990's Batman: The Animated Series depicting a bipolar groan-inducing comic that seems to want to make Batman smile more than kill him...but not by much.
If Nolan and Ledger's take the Joker were put in the same room with the other interpretations of Joker, the other Jokers would either flee in fear...or be killed. The other Jokers were snappy dressers wearing bright, vibrant colors and pastels. Ledger's Joker's clothing is drab, wrinkled, and dirty. Other Jokers stand upright, make wild body movements, speak very vibrantly, and have constant toothy grins. Ledger's Joker is slumped over, moves mostly to act not to posture, speaks calmly and directly most of the time, and smiles mostly because...well, it's permanently carved into his face. Unlike past Jokers there are no stories of acid changing his hair color and skin complexion, nor clown gimmicks like lethally electric joy-buzzers or corsages shooting acid. In its place is a sloppily painted maw, stringy green-blond hair, and pockets filled with knives and grenades. Ledger's acting reminded me more of some of my clients that I worked with as a mental health social worker than the over-the-top buffoon madman that is usually seen. Think John Wayne Gacy rather than a mischief-making Bozo.
Ledger's Joker is three parts psychopath, two parts terrorist, one part criminal genius, and a pinch of a jester. I cannot recall a character in which I would laugh out loud at his behavior in one moment and in the next moment be legitimately terrified. The Joker is a man who considers murder as natural as breathing. As Batman is a symbol of hope, order, and harmony, the Joker is a symbol of despair, chaos, and mass hysteria. Ying and Yang. In many interviews, the crew and cast stated that Ledger kept a "Joker Diary" (which I like to call "Ledger's Ledger") writing down thoughts in character. I'd love to read some of it to see what else this Joker thinks. I'm not going to say "Ledger is going to get a posthumous Oscar nomination" because there are still six months worth of films to be released. However, this is by far Ledger's best performance and it has and will be immortalized for the years to come.
Now I am not going to give out the actual ending. That would ruin it for you. However, I will say one thing.
Joker wins.
I highly recommend that you watch this movie. It is one of the best films I've seen in a long time and I saw a lot of good movies this year. In fact, I think I'm going to see it again in the theater and I usually don't like to spend the money to do that. You will thank me for it and I want to see if you agree with my viewpoint of the ending. Why so serious? Go have a Dark Knight.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Preparing for the Dark Knight
List of what I will do/have done this week in preparation for the Dark Knight in IMAX this Friday.
- Play all episodes of Batman: The Animated Series on my DVD player.
- View the 1960's Batman: The Movie with commentary from Adam West and Burt Ward!
- Read Batman: Year One
- Read The Dark Knight Returns
- Read The Dark Knight Strikes Again (Yeah, I know it's not nearly as good as the first.)
- Obtain my 50th Batman action figure for my Batman Shrine (I know,I'm a little sick in the head.)
- Try to find/obtain a DVD with the original 1940's Batman film serials featuring Batman and Robin fighting The Wizard!
- Go to Barnes and Noble and skim through "Batman and Philosophy"
- Do the Batusi!
- Read Batman: The Long Halloween
- Read Batman: Dark Victory
- Believe in Harvey Dent
- Watch 1989's Batman
- Read Batman: The Killing Joke (featuring a possible origin of the Joker)
- Read all my current issues of All Star Batman and Robin
- Watch Batman: Mask of the Phantasm
- Watch Batman Begins (naturally)
- Recite the words "And Bill Finger" when reading "Batman created by Bob Kane" on film credits and in the books
Why so serious? Review of Dark Knight next week.
- Play all episodes of Batman: The Animated Series on my DVD player.
- View the 1960's Batman: The Movie with commentary from Adam West and Burt Ward!
- Read Batman: Year One
- Read The Dark Knight Returns
- Read The Dark Knight Strikes Again (Yeah, I know it's not nearly as good as the first.)
- Obtain my 50th Batman action figure for my Batman Shrine (I know,I'm a little sick in the head.)
- Try to find/obtain a DVD with the original 1940's Batman film serials featuring Batman and Robin fighting The Wizard!
- Go to Barnes and Noble and skim through "Batman and Philosophy"
- Do the Batusi!
- Read Batman: The Long Halloween
- Read Batman: Dark Victory
- Believe in Harvey Dent
- Watch 1989's Batman
- Read Batman: The Killing Joke (featuring a possible origin of the Joker)
- Read all my current issues of All Star Batman and Robin
- Watch Batman: Mask of the Phantasm
- Watch Batman Begins (naturally)
- Recite the words "And Bill Finger" when reading "Batman created by Bob Kane" on film credits and in the books
Why so serious? Review of Dark Knight next week.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Barnes at the Movies: Hellboy 2 - The Golden Army
For those of you who didn't watch the first Hellboy (which is a shame because you'd probably should), it is yet another movie based off of a successful comic book franchise. In the 1940's, the Nazis performed a summoning that was thwarted by the Allies, but not without something coming from the portal to the underworld. It was a baby demon with a large right hand made of stone. The demon was taken in and raised in the U.S. military. The troops gave him a name. They called him Hellboy. Now, Hellboy and those like him serve in the ultra classified Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense, an organization that...well, let me steal a line from the first movie: "There are things that bump in the night. We are the ones who bump back." The film introduced Hellboy along with his teammates. First, Abraham Sapien, a telepathic fish man, and Elizabeth Sherman, an unstable pyrokinetic and Hellboy's love interest. I'll let you fill in the rest of the details by watching it.
Hellboy 2 starts off with a legend that long ago of the kingdoms of humankind and the mythical waged war upon each other. After many battles, the Woodland King of the mythical raised the the Golden Army, an unstoppable force that nearly destroyed all of mankind, with his crown being the controlling force behind the army. Deciding that the Golden Army was too powerful, the King split his crown into three pieces, giving one of the pieces to mankind in exchange for a truce. Man would keep the land and the mythical would keep the forests. Years and years later, when humankind's piece of the crown is stolen during an artifact auction, the B.P.R.D. is on the case.
Hellboy (Ron Perlman) and Elizabeth (Selma Blair) going through a rough patch in their relationship, much like any couple would when they move in together...only involving a firestarter and a demon that loves Baby Ruths and cats. Meanwhile, Abe Sapien (Doug Jones) longs for companionship and understanding while B.P.R.D. director, Tom Manning (the hilarious and wonderful Jeffrey Tambor) is trying to keep Hellboy in check and out of the public eye. In light of Hellboy's constant insubordination, Manning brings in B.P.R.D. European associate named Johann Kraus (voiced by Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane), an ectoplasmic medium trapped in a containment suit, to lead the team and follow protocol. Can the misfits get their act together and protect mankind from the threat of the Golden Army's resurrection?
The movie is just as good as the first, however it travels more to the weird creatures than ghosts, demonic creatures, and the undead that dominated the first one. Director Guillermo Del Toro sculpts a grand world full of imaginative abominations. Del Toro's team did a great job mixing both CGI and costuming together to mesh and mold each monster. The look of the film is more like Del Toro's often praised Pan's Labyrinth than the first Hellboy. The scene in the Troll's Market is reminiscent of the now-classic Cantina scene in the original Star Wars in regards to it's plethora of busy-body creatures.
Ron Perlman makes Hellboy his own with his wiseguy delivery; imagine John McClane from Die Hard looking like Tim Curry from Legend. Doug Jones does a great job being Abe, lending his voice now that David Hyde Pierce abandoned the role he took in the first film. Selma Blair delivers as Liz and is used much better than in the first movie. The stand-out is Seth MacFarlane who has spot on delivery as Johann with both his German accent and being able to deliver his lines, comedic or otherwise, without sounding too cartoony like his...well, cartoon.
The film's themes continue from the first movie. The themes of being different and the desire to be accepted, along with the debate of fate versus choice. Hellboy, mind you, is supposed to bring the destruction of the world. His true name is Ahnung Un Rama (Son of the Fallen One), you know. He is destined to damn us, but as of now, chooses to help mankind. These themes are touched upon in this film and leaves room for possible growth (possible foreshadowing) if there is a third movie.
Despite the dark, grotesque look of the film, Hellboy 2 is mostly lighthearted and fun...and it oddly fits. Much like the characters in the film, it looks scary, but is friendly once you get acquainted. If you want a decent story, love monsters, and like good action, check it out.
Oh, and there is a great scene featuring Barry Manilow's "I Can't Smile Without You." Enjoy.
Hellboy 2 starts off with a legend that long ago of the kingdoms of humankind and the mythical waged war upon each other. After many battles, the Woodland King of the mythical raised the the Golden Army, an unstoppable force that nearly destroyed all of mankind, with his crown being the controlling force behind the army. Deciding that the Golden Army was too powerful, the King split his crown into three pieces, giving one of the pieces to mankind in exchange for a truce. Man would keep the land and the mythical would keep the forests. Years and years later, when humankind's piece of the crown is stolen during an artifact auction, the B.P.R.D. is on the case.
Hellboy (Ron Perlman) and Elizabeth (Selma Blair) going through a rough patch in their relationship, much like any couple would when they move in together...only involving a firestarter and a demon that loves Baby Ruths and cats. Meanwhile, Abe Sapien (Doug Jones) longs for companionship and understanding while B.P.R.D. director, Tom Manning (the hilarious and wonderful Jeffrey Tambor) is trying to keep Hellboy in check and out of the public eye. In light of Hellboy's constant insubordination, Manning brings in B.P.R.D. European associate named Johann Kraus (voiced by Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane), an ectoplasmic medium trapped in a containment suit, to lead the team and follow protocol. Can the misfits get their act together and protect mankind from the threat of the Golden Army's resurrection?
The movie is just as good as the first, however it travels more to the weird creatures than ghosts, demonic creatures, and the undead that dominated the first one. Director Guillermo Del Toro sculpts a grand world full of imaginative abominations. Del Toro's team did a great job mixing both CGI and costuming together to mesh and mold each monster. The look of the film is more like Del Toro's often praised Pan's Labyrinth than the first Hellboy. The scene in the Troll's Market is reminiscent of the now-classic Cantina scene in the original Star Wars in regards to it's plethora of busy-body creatures.
Ron Perlman makes Hellboy his own with his wiseguy delivery; imagine John McClane from Die Hard looking like Tim Curry from Legend. Doug Jones does a great job being Abe, lending his voice now that David Hyde Pierce abandoned the role he took in the first film. Selma Blair delivers as Liz and is used much better than in the first movie. The stand-out is Seth MacFarlane who has spot on delivery as Johann with both his German accent and being able to deliver his lines, comedic or otherwise, without sounding too cartoony like his...well, cartoon.
The film's themes continue from the first movie. The themes of being different and the desire to be accepted, along with the debate of fate versus choice. Hellboy, mind you, is supposed to bring the destruction of the world. His true name is Ahnung Un Rama (Son of the Fallen One), you know. He is destined to damn us, but as of now, chooses to help mankind. These themes are touched upon in this film and leaves room for possible growth (possible foreshadowing) if there is a third movie.
Despite the dark, grotesque look of the film, Hellboy 2 is mostly lighthearted and fun...and it oddly fits. Much like the characters in the film, it looks scary, but is friendly once you get acquainted. If you want a decent story, love monsters, and like good action, check it out.
Oh, and there is a great scene featuring Barry Manilow's "I Can't Smile Without You." Enjoy.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Barnes at the Movies: WALL-E
Man. Pixar. They come out with a new film virtually every year and every year they hit it out of the park (even with the not-as-great-as-most Cars). However, most Pixar films not only do well because of the cutting-edge animation and great storytelling, but because of the stars that voice the characters. This year, however, there are no star studded voice actors. Unless you count Jeff Garlin (who you wouldn't know unless you are a fan of Curb Your Enthusiasm), John Ratzenberger (who Pixar has in every movie), Fred Willard (that sorta funny guy that you always seem to recognize but have no idea from where), and brief lines from Sigourney Weaver(okay, she's a legit star), then there are no stars in this movie. The character of WALL-E even looks like Johnny 5 from the Short Circuit films. With those hindrances, can the film live up to Pixar's stellar reputation?
WALL-E lives up. Surpasses. Enters a new galaxy.
WALL-E is a story about a Waste Allocation Load Lifter- Earth class or WALL-E. WALL-E's task is to clean up an abandoned Earth that has been stockpiled with garbage. Earth's denizens have apparently left on a giant spaceship brought to you by the corporate juggernaut Buy N' Large, leaving WALL-E to clean up Earth until it is hospitable for humans to return and live upon. While WALL-E performs his designed task, he curiously explores and collects various items of interest along with a pet cockroach. When a spaceship lands on Earth, WALL-E is introduced to another robot named EVE, however her directives are classified. Smitten, WALL-E tries to woo EVE into holding hands...er, claws...er, clamps. Anyway, that's when the story really gets going and EVE's purpose is revealed.
The animation in WALL-E is fantastic. The character models are distorted and "cartoony" but it looks like every shadow, every speck of dirt, every hair, and every freckle is real. The art direction is fantastic and every little nuance adds to the film. You know you are doing a good job making your characters emote when most of the cast consists of ROBOTS.
The film has very, very little dialogue however there is never a moment in which you are lost or confused in following the story or the characters' motivations. The story is a fantastic Disney tale with a little bit of social commentary regarding the environment and consumerism culture that doesn't come off as too preachy (hypocritically though, six months from now this movie will be sold at Walmart alongside WALL-E t-shirts and action figures). As with Christopher Reeves making you believe a man can fly in Superman, WALL-E makes you believe a robot can love.
I cannot recommend this movie enough. As of this writing, I consider WALL-E to be the best movie of 2008. Not best animated. Not best summer flick. BEST FILM.
So watch it. Get off the computer and watch it. It's worth the money. Oh, you don't like animated movies? Get over it. Watch it. Ashamed to watch a "kid's movie" at your age? Go with your niece/nephew. Take your friend's kid (he/she would probably thank you for two child-free hours). Sit next to a six year old, I don't care. Just do yourself a favor and go.
Go!
GO!!!
WALL-E lives up. Surpasses. Enters a new galaxy.
WALL-E is a story about a Waste Allocation Load Lifter- Earth class or WALL-E. WALL-E's task is to clean up an abandoned Earth that has been stockpiled with garbage. Earth's denizens have apparently left on a giant spaceship brought to you by the corporate juggernaut Buy N' Large, leaving WALL-E to clean up Earth until it is hospitable for humans to return and live upon. While WALL-E performs his designed task, he curiously explores and collects various items of interest along with a pet cockroach. When a spaceship lands on Earth, WALL-E is introduced to another robot named EVE, however her directives are classified. Smitten, WALL-E tries to woo EVE into holding hands...er, claws...er, clamps. Anyway, that's when the story really gets going and EVE's purpose is revealed.
The animation in WALL-E is fantastic. The character models are distorted and "cartoony" but it looks like every shadow, every speck of dirt, every hair, and every freckle is real. The art direction is fantastic and every little nuance adds to the film. You know you are doing a good job making your characters emote when most of the cast consists of ROBOTS.
The film has very, very little dialogue however there is never a moment in which you are lost or confused in following the story or the characters' motivations. The story is a fantastic Disney tale with a little bit of social commentary regarding the environment and consumerism culture that doesn't come off as too preachy (hypocritically though, six months from now this movie will be sold at Walmart alongside WALL-E t-shirts and action figures). As with Christopher Reeves making you believe a man can fly in Superman, WALL-E makes you believe a robot can love.
I cannot recommend this movie enough. As of this writing, I consider WALL-E to be the best movie of 2008. Not best animated. Not best summer flick. BEST FILM.
So watch it. Get off the computer and watch it. It's worth the money. Oh, you don't like animated movies? Get over it. Watch it. Ashamed to watch a "kid's movie" at your age? Go with your niece/nephew. Take your friend's kid (he/she would probably thank you for two child-free hours). Sit next to a six year old, I don't care. Just do yourself a favor and go.
Go!
GO!!!
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Barnes at the Movies: Wanted
I went to see the movie Wanted just because I was a fan of the graphic novel. I knew like many movies that it was only loosely based off the source material, but I wanted to see the cinema spin on the story.
Wanted follows Wesley Gibson (The Last King of Scotland's James McAvoy), a twenty-something cubicle dweller that hates his job, his boss, and life in general. Wesley's emasculating girlfriend is also screwing his best friend and Wesley practically lives off his anti-anxiety medication. All that changes when he finds out that he is the son of a great assassin.
Wesley is recruited in the Fraternity, a league of noble assassins that have been in existence for over 1,000 years, through his father's colleagues, Fox (Angelina Jolie) and the head of the Fraternity, Sloan (Morgan Freeman). The Fraternity picks up Wesley and trains him in the deadly arts, including the supernatural-Matrix-esque bullet curving. The Fraternity wishes that Wesley take the mantle of his father and take out a rogue Fraternity agent that happens to be his father's killer. Meh.
The first 20 minutes of the movie followed the graphic novel pretty well then just made up the rest as it went along. Mind you, for the sake of the review, I'm not judging the movie based off of accuracy of the book, but it is still a meh-movie. There were some cool moments in the film, but the story's plot twist wasn't really twisty, the dialogue seemed hackneyed. The special effects weren't bad, but if you have seen The Matrix then it's nothing you haven't seen before nor something you haven't seen improved upon. It attempted to be an action film with a good story, but turned into a stock R-rated action film in which characters shoot guns and say "fuck" a lot.
Angelina Jolie was one of the main selling points of this movie, but she does very little acting and seems to be hired to just look sexy while holding a gun. That and a gratuitous shot of her bare ass. James McAvoy did a decent job as the Wesley Gibson character and was the highlight of the film. Morgan Freeman was phoning it in, but Freeman phoning it in is better than most actors doing their Oscar best.
In other words, this movie isn't the worst I've ever seen, but it didn't leave any lasting impression on me positive or negative. Not good, not terrible, just...meh. The film might be Wanted, but it's gotta look for someone else to fill that void.
Wanted follows Wesley Gibson (The Last King of Scotland's James McAvoy), a twenty-something cubicle dweller that hates his job, his boss, and life in general. Wesley's emasculating girlfriend is also screwing his best friend and Wesley practically lives off his anti-anxiety medication. All that changes when he finds out that he is the son of a great assassin.
Wesley is recruited in the Fraternity, a league of noble assassins that have been in existence for over 1,000 years, through his father's colleagues, Fox (Angelina Jolie) and the head of the Fraternity, Sloan (Morgan Freeman). The Fraternity picks up Wesley and trains him in the deadly arts, including the supernatural-Matrix-esque bullet curving. The Fraternity wishes that Wesley take the mantle of his father and take out a rogue Fraternity agent that happens to be his father's killer. Meh.
The first 20 minutes of the movie followed the graphic novel pretty well then just made up the rest as it went along. Mind you, for the sake of the review, I'm not judging the movie based off of accuracy of the book, but it is still a meh-movie. There were some cool moments in the film, but the story's plot twist wasn't really twisty, the dialogue seemed hackneyed. The special effects weren't bad, but if you have seen The Matrix then it's nothing you haven't seen before nor something you haven't seen improved upon. It attempted to be an action film with a good story, but turned into a stock R-rated action film in which characters shoot guns and say "fuck" a lot.
Angelina Jolie was one of the main selling points of this movie, but she does very little acting and seems to be hired to just look sexy while holding a gun. That and a gratuitous shot of her bare ass. James McAvoy did a decent job as the Wesley Gibson character and was the highlight of the film. Morgan Freeman was phoning it in, but Freeman phoning it in is better than most actors doing their Oscar best.
In other words, this movie isn't the worst I've ever seen, but it didn't leave any lasting impression on me positive or negative. Not good, not terrible, just...meh. The film might be Wanted, but it's gotta look for someone else to fill that void.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Barnes at the Movies: Get Smart
I saw Get Smart yesterday and overall, it was an okay movie. Brief synopsis: Maxwell Smart (Steve Carell) is an analyst for C.O.N.T.R.O.L. who recent passed an exam for becoming a field agent. C.O.N.T.R.O.L.'s main purpose is to thwart the evil doings of K.A.O.S., a sinister organization that has been thought dead since the 1960's. After C.O.N.T.R.O.L.'s secret headquarters have been compromised when it is believed K.A.O.S. has stolen the makings of a nuclear device, it is up to Smart and Agent 99 (Anne Hathaway) to stop K.A.O.S. with the guidance of the Chief (Alan Arkin) and Agent 23 (Dwayne "Seriously, man, accept the fact you are still going to be known as The Rock" Johnson).
First, the cons of the movie. You've seen this movie before. Trust me, you have. The plot is totally predictable at every single turn. That being said, even though I have seen this movie before with a different title, it's a good movie that I remember seeing.
The jokes are funny and, in my opinion, that takes precedence over mediocre plot when it comes to comedy. Don't get me wrong, if a comedy has a great plot and great jokes then it's pure, re-watchable gold, but if the comedy's jokes suck along with a weak plot then there is no reason to see the film in the first place. Example being, did anyone watch Airplane for the story? My point stands.
Steve Carell is Michael Scott from TV's The Office as Maxwell Smart. Depending on your viewpoint, this can be a pro or a con. Those who think "pro" are intrigued at the Michael Scott character put into a secret agent position (which is eerie since the Michael Scott character lived out this fantasy in a screenplay he wrote about secret agent named Michael Scarn called Threat Level: Midnight). Those that think "con" would have liked to see Carell try a different approach or think that they could see Michael Scott for free on TV as opposed to forking money to see a flick.
With the main cons being predictability and Carell being his TV character, I wish to give a list of pros and stuff to look forward to if you do choose to see the movie:
- Dwayne "Dude, you just had a three disc DVD of your greatest wrestling matches released last week, no one is going to think of calling you anything but The Rock" Johnson's best performance since Be Cool.
- Two words, one man, too-small-of-a-role: PATRICK WARBURTON.
- Alan Arkin being the funniest wise-ass in this whole movie.
- Dalip "The Great Khali" Singh in his best performance inside or outside a wrestling ring. He gets a lot of screen time, too. Go to the movie just to donate more money to the poor children of Punjab.
- Good jokes that don't get run into the ground.
- Anne Hathaway is easy on the eyes.
and the most important "pro" in this movie...
- Bill Murray, in a cameo, from inside a tree. No, not on top of a tree. INSIDE A TREE. Awesome.
So, if you got a few bucks and a no-nothing afternoon, go to a cheap matinee. That or rent it and watch it with friends when it is released on DVD. The movie was almost a must-see, but "missed it by that much."
First, the cons of the movie. You've seen this movie before. Trust me, you have. The plot is totally predictable at every single turn. That being said, even though I have seen this movie before with a different title, it's a good movie that I remember seeing.
The jokes are funny and, in my opinion, that takes precedence over mediocre plot when it comes to comedy. Don't get me wrong, if a comedy has a great plot and great jokes then it's pure, re-watchable gold, but if the comedy's jokes suck along with a weak plot then there is no reason to see the film in the first place. Example being, did anyone watch Airplane for the story? My point stands.
Steve Carell is Michael Scott from TV's The Office as Maxwell Smart. Depending on your viewpoint, this can be a pro or a con. Those who think "pro" are intrigued at the Michael Scott character put into a secret agent position (which is eerie since the Michael Scott character lived out this fantasy in a screenplay he wrote about secret agent named Michael Scarn called Threat Level: Midnight). Those that think "con" would have liked to see Carell try a different approach or think that they could see Michael Scott for free on TV as opposed to forking money to see a flick.
With the main cons being predictability and Carell being his TV character, I wish to give a list of pros and stuff to look forward to if you do choose to see the movie:
- Dwayne "Dude, you just had a three disc DVD of your greatest wrestling matches released last week, no one is going to think of calling you anything but The Rock" Johnson's best performance since Be Cool.
- Two words, one man, too-small-of-a-role: PATRICK WARBURTON.
- Alan Arkin being the funniest wise-ass in this whole movie.
- Dalip "The Great Khali" Singh in his best performance inside or outside a wrestling ring. He gets a lot of screen time, too. Go to the movie just to donate more money to the poor children of Punjab.
- Good jokes that don't get run into the ground.
- Anne Hathaway is easy on the eyes.
and the most important "pro" in this movie...
- Bill Murray, in a cameo, from inside a tree. No, not on top of a tree. INSIDE A TREE. Awesome.
So, if you got a few bucks and a no-nothing afternoon, go to a cheap matinee. That or rent it and watch it with friends when it is released on DVD. The movie was almost a must-see, but "missed it by that much."
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Someone Please Think of the Children
High gas prices. Bad economy. The war in Iraq. These are valid issues in America, but not so much as this troubling concern .
"C" is for change. It's good enough for me.
(Side Note: Don't read too much into this. Just because I use the word "change" it doesn't mean I'm pro-Obama.)
(Additional Side Note: The previous side note doesn't mean I'm pro-McCain either.)
"C" is for change. It's good enough for me.
(Side Note: Don't read too much into this. Just because I use the word "change" it doesn't mean I'm pro-Obama.)
(Additional Side Note: The previous side note doesn't mean I'm pro-McCain either.)
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Barnes at the Movies: The Incredible Apology...I Mean, Hulk
In 2003, Ang Lee and the folks at Marvel made a movie about the Hulk. Ballyhoo and whatnot followed along with bad, bad reviews. Something was wrong. Ang Lee is a great director. However, he is known for pieces with grace, love, and a little sorrow. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon and the Oscar-winning Brokeback Mountain are great stories that he told. He really likes depth and emotion in his characters. Which made him the worst choice for Hulk.
While I'm not about dumbing down movies, Hulk is first and foremost, a comic book character. Not just any comic character, but one that leaves destruction and fury in his wake. Hulk no cry and have arty cinematography, HULK SMASH!!! Fans of the Hulk expect some drama, but a lot of action and mayhem. Hulk had lots of drama (it oozed drama) and very little smash to it. Therefore, the film suffered and bombed.
Five years later, Marvel has made a public apology...and I accept it. The Incredible Hulk isn't so much a sequel as it is a retelling of Bruce Banner's (Edward Norton) plight. Banner was exposed to severe amounts of radiation causing him to transform into a behemoth, dubbed "The Hulk," whenever his heart rate is elevated and he is angered. This leaves Banner with little choice but to exile himself in order to run from General Thaddeus "Thunderbolt" Ross (William Hurt) and the military who are attempting to weaponize the beast within him while leaving behind his longtime girlfriend, Betty Ross (Liv Tyler). While in hiding, Banner attempts to find methods of curing himself while simultaneously studies meditation and anger management in order to quell the monster. In order to track down and capture Banner, General Ross is assisted by an accomplished soldier named Emil Blonsky (Tim Roth) who is willing to undergo inhuman experimentation in order to be physically on-par with the Hulk.
The movie is good, but far from perfect. Liv Tyler does a decent job acting, but the Betty Ross character is portrayed more like the nail-biting, worried girlfriend than the smart doctor that she is. William Hurt is fantastic in his role of the General in what would otherwise be a cookie-cutter angry, military-first soldier. Edward Norton is perfect for Bruce Banner. Acting in Fight Club must have helped him portray this "tough bookwormy wimp" character. Tim Roth is the main villain, which is what he is best suited for in most films. No complaints there.
The film does a great job with the look of the Hulk monster. Yes, it's clearly CGI but it doesn't look like the green play-dough monster from the last movie. The animators did a great job with the facial expressions of the jade giant. The smashings, especially the final fight, were well done and reminiscent of the great monster movies. There is little drama and character development, probably shorthanding it due to the overhaul of it from the last movie, but the slow moments that were there were good and meaningful.
Is it as good as Iron Man? No. Is it high art? No and it's not supposed to be. Is it fun and make you root for Bruce Banner? Yes. So mission accomplished. Oh, and speaking of Iron Man, Tony Stark (Robert Downey, Jr.) makes an appearance in the movie. I'll leave it to you to see where in the film and why. You did stay after the credits of Iron Man, didn't you?
While I'm not about dumbing down movies, Hulk is first and foremost, a comic book character. Not just any comic character, but one that leaves destruction and fury in his wake. Hulk no cry and have arty cinematography, HULK SMASH!!! Fans of the Hulk expect some drama, but a lot of action and mayhem. Hulk had lots of drama (it oozed drama) and very little smash to it. Therefore, the film suffered and bombed.
Five years later, Marvel has made a public apology...and I accept it. The Incredible Hulk isn't so much a sequel as it is a retelling of Bruce Banner's (Edward Norton) plight. Banner was exposed to severe amounts of radiation causing him to transform into a behemoth, dubbed "The Hulk," whenever his heart rate is elevated and he is angered. This leaves Banner with little choice but to exile himself in order to run from General Thaddeus "Thunderbolt" Ross (William Hurt) and the military who are attempting to weaponize the beast within him while leaving behind his longtime girlfriend, Betty Ross (Liv Tyler). While in hiding, Banner attempts to find methods of curing himself while simultaneously studies meditation and anger management in order to quell the monster. In order to track down and capture Banner, General Ross is assisted by an accomplished soldier named Emil Blonsky (Tim Roth) who is willing to undergo inhuman experimentation in order to be physically on-par with the Hulk.
The movie is good, but far from perfect. Liv Tyler does a decent job acting, but the Betty Ross character is portrayed more like the nail-biting, worried girlfriend than the smart doctor that she is. William Hurt is fantastic in his role of the General in what would otherwise be a cookie-cutter angry, military-first soldier. Edward Norton is perfect for Bruce Banner. Acting in Fight Club must have helped him portray this "tough bookwormy wimp" character. Tim Roth is the main villain, which is what he is best suited for in most films. No complaints there.
The film does a great job with the look of the Hulk monster. Yes, it's clearly CGI but it doesn't look like the green play-dough monster from the last movie. The animators did a great job with the facial expressions of the jade giant. The smashings, especially the final fight, were well done and reminiscent of the great monster movies. There is little drama and character development, probably shorthanding it due to the overhaul of it from the last movie, but the slow moments that were there were good and meaningful.
Is it as good as Iron Man? No. Is it high art? No and it's not supposed to be. Is it fun and make you root for Bruce Banner? Yes. So mission accomplished. Oh, and speaking of Iron Man, Tony Stark (Robert Downey, Jr.) makes an appearance in the movie. I'll leave it to you to see where in the film and why. You did stay after the credits of Iron Man, didn't you?
Thursday, June 05, 2008
The Color Black
Icebreaker questions. These can either be very insightful and tell you a lot about a person or as enlightening as asking "What would you like for dinner?" My favorite ice breaker question, aside from the popular what superpower would you pick, is "If you were a color, what color would that be?"
My color. I'd be black.
It's not because I wear it all the time. Nor is it because I agree with Johnny Cash's song "The Man in Black." It's just...me. Black is given a negative stigma much of the time and that is unfortunate. Black isn't totally negative. It isn't totally positive.
Black has a pristine presence. It sticks out on its own but can also blend in with the background when other colors are around. It can see as fearful and scary, but under a different perspective can be seen as comforting, enveloping others like a blanket. Black has depth; it is a void. It is the color of mystery. When you stare into black are you staring at nothing...or staring at something limitless? Is black empty or is it something ready to be filled? Is it a color of completion or a color of potential?
Under self reflection, I am the color of black. With others I stick out due to my personality and size, but I also merge into the social background. To those who don't know me, I have an intimidating presence. To those that just got to know me, I get along well; I compliment most colors. I have a vat of potential in many fields, but are some of those fields filled to its limit. While I am fun loving, I have a more melancholic viewpoint which is darkness; black. I also believe life is without limits...like staring into black. Many of my friends confide to me and think of me as a good listener of their troubles; that I won't judge or expose them...they are comforted that the black can cover-up their flaws or bring out the positive colors. I am independent; colors may be complimented alongside me but cannot be mixed with me. I am cryptic at times, exposed in others, the color of purity in some cultures, the color of the tainted in others. I am black.
What color are you?
My color. I'd be black.
It's not because I wear it all the time. Nor is it because I agree with Johnny Cash's song "The Man in Black." It's just...me. Black is given a negative stigma much of the time and that is unfortunate. Black isn't totally negative. It isn't totally positive.
Black has a pristine presence. It sticks out on its own but can also blend in with the background when other colors are around. It can see as fearful and scary, but under a different perspective can be seen as comforting, enveloping others like a blanket. Black has depth; it is a void. It is the color of mystery. When you stare into black are you staring at nothing...or staring at something limitless? Is black empty or is it something ready to be filled? Is it a color of completion or a color of potential?
Under self reflection, I am the color of black. With others I stick out due to my personality and size, but I also merge into the social background. To those who don't know me, I have an intimidating presence. To those that just got to know me, I get along well; I compliment most colors. I have a vat of potential in many fields, but are some of those fields filled to its limit. While I am fun loving, I have a more melancholic viewpoint which is darkness; black. I also believe life is without limits...like staring into black. Many of my friends confide to me and think of me as a good listener of their troubles; that I won't judge or expose them...they are comforted that the black can cover-up their flaws or bring out the positive colors. I am independent; colors may be complimented alongside me but cannot be mixed with me. I am cryptic at times, exposed in others, the color of purity in some cultures, the color of the tainted in others. I am black.
What color are you?
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Barnes at the Movies: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
Alabama Henderson, er, Indiana Jones has developed into a modern day movie icon over the past twenty years and with the announcement of a fourth installment of Indy's adventures, many voiced concerns of making yet another sequel nineteen years after the last movie. I was among them, afraid that Harrison Ford wouldn't be able to get his Jones back and that this movie would just turn into a passing of the torch to Spielberg favorite, Shia Lebouf. I'm so glad that I am wrong.
Crystal Skull sees Jones (Ford) in 1957, his loyalty to his country being questioned by the FBI and losing his job as a university professor. He is approached by a young man named Mutt Williams (Lebouf) who is sent by his mother, an apparent acquaintance to Jones, to ask Jones to assist him in rescuing her and helping a fellow archaeological colleague of Jones' and friend to Williams, Professor Oxley, by finding an ancient Mayan crystal skull. All the while, Jones and Williams are being chased, captured, and all that rot by a group of Soviets led by a supposed telepath, Irina Spalko (Cate Blanchett).
Ford picks up his character right where he left it and while I expected to hate Lebouf, he actually did well in his role. I expected him to fill the hack role of the trying-to-be-wise-ass-actually-annoying-the-audience young sidekick to Indy (think Ryan Reynolds and Aschton Kutcher) or his apparent typecast of the nerdy, I'm-not-sure-how-I'm-gonna-do-this-coming-of-age-get-the-hot-girl character, but he showed why Spielberg is nuts for the guy. The rest of the cast do their roles well and flow with the tone of the movie. There is also a cameo appearance by Sean Connery...'s photo.
As for the movie as a whole? This movie isn't high art nor has intriguing character development, but that's never been the point of the Indiana Jones series. The question you need to ask for these type of adventure movies isn't "How's the cinematography/subtext?" it's "Is it fun?" And it's fun. Go Spielberg. While in past films there have been elements of mysticism and the supernatural, I still didn't expect to see elements of science fiction (yes, sci-fi) in the film. However, it makes some sense in that the bulk of the series took place in the 1930's and 1940's (when there were quite a few action-adventure movies) and this movie takes place in the 1950's (when science fiction films were rising in number). There are a few references to the first Indy movie, Raiders of the Lost Ark, including involving a character from that film.
In conclusion, grab a fedora, a bullwhip, a smirk, and pay full admission to see this flick. If you go into the film wanting to have fun, you will. If you walk in with a jaundice eye, then you're being a snake. And Indiana Jones hates snakes.
Crystal Skull sees Jones (Ford) in 1957, his loyalty to his country being questioned by the FBI and losing his job as a university professor. He is approached by a young man named Mutt Williams (Lebouf) who is sent by his mother, an apparent acquaintance to Jones, to ask Jones to assist him in rescuing her and helping a fellow archaeological colleague of Jones' and friend to Williams, Professor Oxley, by finding an ancient Mayan crystal skull. All the while, Jones and Williams are being chased, captured, and all that rot by a group of Soviets led by a supposed telepath, Irina Spalko (Cate Blanchett).
Ford picks up his character right where he left it and while I expected to hate Lebouf, he actually did well in his role. I expected him to fill the hack role of the trying-to-be-wise-ass-actually-annoying-the-audience young sidekick to Indy (think Ryan Reynolds and Aschton Kutcher) or his apparent typecast of the nerdy, I'm-not-sure-how-I'm-gonna-do-this-coming-of-age-get-the-hot-girl character, but he showed why Spielberg is nuts for the guy. The rest of the cast do their roles well and flow with the tone of the movie. There is also a cameo appearance by Sean Connery...'s photo.
As for the movie as a whole? This movie isn't high art nor has intriguing character development, but that's never been the point of the Indiana Jones series. The question you need to ask for these type of adventure movies isn't "How's the cinematography/subtext?" it's "Is it fun?" And it's fun. Go Spielberg. While in past films there have been elements of mysticism and the supernatural, I still didn't expect to see elements of science fiction (yes, sci-fi) in the film. However, it makes some sense in that the bulk of the series took place in the 1930's and 1940's (when there were quite a few action-adventure movies) and this movie takes place in the 1950's (when science fiction films were rising in number). There are a few references to the first Indy movie, Raiders of the Lost Ark, including involving a character from that film.
In conclusion, grab a fedora, a bullwhip, a smirk, and pay full admission to see this flick. If you go into the film wanting to have fun, you will. If you walk in with a jaundice eye, then you're being a snake. And Indiana Jones hates snakes.
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
Barnes At The Movies: Iron Man
So I saw Iron Man last weekend and decided that I'd write a little review of the movie and any others that I see during this summer blockbuster season. Iron Man is based off the Marvel comic book of the same name and is the first Marvel Universe movie totally in-house in Marvel's production and distribution department. The theory behind this would be Marvel would have primary control of the futures of their properties and open doors for some characters that most studios wouldn't take chances with, an example being Marvel making a movie about Ant-Man. Who's Ant-Man? My point exactly. The underlying hope is that if Iron Man did well along with other Marvel character movies that this could open doors for character crossovers that would otherwise would be impossible due to interference from other companies (i.e. The X-Men could never coexist with Spiderman because Wolverine is with 20th Century Fox and Peter Parker is hanging out with Sony).
So let's take a look at Marvel's first step into independence. Robert Downey Jr. plays Tony Stark, a booze-hungry playboy (art imitating life, eh, Rob?) who is a brilliant inventor and scientist specializing in creating weapons for the U.S. military. While at a demonstration of one of his new missles, he is kidnapped by a terrorist group and his heart is injured to the point that an electomagnet is inserted into his chest in order to prevent shrapnel from entering his heart and killing him (remember, this is a comic book movie so suspend disbelief). The terrorists force Stark into making them a version of his newest weapon, but instead he secretly builds himself a crude suit of armor that assists in his escape.
After a huge firefight, Tony is rescued and reunites with his Air Force affiliated best friend, Jim Rhodes (played by Terrence Howard), and his personal assistant, Pepper Pots (played by Gwyneth Paltrow). The usually aloof Stark is now concerned that his weapons are being used by both sides of the battlefield and wants out of the arms business, much to the chagrin of his business associate Obidiah Stane (played by the Dude himself, Jeff Bridges). While his pleas of pulling out of the weapons game go on deaf ears, Stark redesigns his armor suit and thus Iron Man is born.
I have to say that I went into this movie with cynicism. I wasn't sure how Marvel could promote and create a film without the input of a proven studio and I wasn't sure that the Iron Man character had steel legs to stand on for a mainstream audience. I thought it would be all flash and explosions with little story and I have never been so glad to be wrong. When it could have been easy to make a movie that was pure eyeball-orgy, Marvel made a movie with the same reasoning they had for its comics: Make stories about people with powers instead of stories about powerful people.
Jon Favreau, who is known for directing comedies like Swingers and Elf, did a great job in creating a fine balance between plot driven, character forming scenes and blow-em-up action. Robert Downey, Jr. was born to play Tony Stark. Minus the techno-genius, the two are exactly the same guy. Downey does a great job in creating a Howard Hawks-esque, fast talking egomaniac that you can't help to cheer and even feel sorry for. The story was solid, the special effects did not take you away from the film, and the action scenes struck all the right notes.
I usually judge a movie by how much I'd pay to see it. I always ask myself, "Would I'd be willing to pay $15 for an evening show, a $5-7 matinee, wait until it gets to the cheapo $2 theater, rent or Netflix it, wait until it's on cable, or not watch it at all?" So on a scale of -$5 (in which the theater owes me money) to $15 (the most I'd be willing to sit in a theater to watch a flick), I give Iron Man a solid $12.75. Let's face it, the movie isn't going to the Oscars and it's too good to be nominated for an MTV Movie Award, but if you like fun action flicks with solid acting performances go and see it. Oh, and be sure to stick around after the credits for a grand surprise...Avengers Assemble?
So let's take a look at Marvel's first step into independence. Robert Downey Jr. plays Tony Stark, a booze-hungry playboy (art imitating life, eh, Rob?) who is a brilliant inventor and scientist specializing in creating weapons for the U.S. military. While at a demonstration of one of his new missles, he is kidnapped by a terrorist group and his heart is injured to the point that an electomagnet is inserted into his chest in order to prevent shrapnel from entering his heart and killing him (remember, this is a comic book movie so suspend disbelief). The terrorists force Stark into making them a version of his newest weapon, but instead he secretly builds himself a crude suit of armor that assists in his escape.
After a huge firefight, Tony is rescued and reunites with his Air Force affiliated best friend, Jim Rhodes (played by Terrence Howard), and his personal assistant, Pepper Pots (played by Gwyneth Paltrow). The usually aloof Stark is now concerned that his weapons are being used by both sides of the battlefield and wants out of the arms business, much to the chagrin of his business associate Obidiah Stane (played by the Dude himself, Jeff Bridges). While his pleas of pulling out of the weapons game go on deaf ears, Stark redesigns his armor suit and thus Iron Man is born.
I have to say that I went into this movie with cynicism. I wasn't sure how Marvel could promote and create a film without the input of a proven studio and I wasn't sure that the Iron Man character had steel legs to stand on for a mainstream audience. I thought it would be all flash and explosions with little story and I have never been so glad to be wrong. When it could have been easy to make a movie that was pure eyeball-orgy, Marvel made a movie with the same reasoning they had for its comics: Make stories about people with powers instead of stories about powerful people.
Jon Favreau, who is known for directing comedies like Swingers and Elf, did a great job in creating a fine balance between plot driven, character forming scenes and blow-em-up action. Robert Downey, Jr. was born to play Tony Stark. Minus the techno-genius, the two are exactly the same guy. Downey does a great job in creating a Howard Hawks-esque, fast talking egomaniac that you can't help to cheer and even feel sorry for. The story was solid, the special effects did not take you away from the film, and the action scenes struck all the right notes.
I usually judge a movie by how much I'd pay to see it. I always ask myself, "Would I'd be willing to pay $15 for an evening show, a $5-7 matinee, wait until it gets to the cheapo $2 theater, rent or Netflix it, wait until it's on cable, or not watch it at all?" So on a scale of -$5 (in which the theater owes me money) to $15 (the most I'd be willing to sit in a theater to watch a flick), I give Iron Man a solid $12.75. Let's face it, the movie isn't going to the Oscars and it's too good to be nominated for an MTV Movie Award, but if you like fun action flicks with solid acting performances go and see it. Oh, and be sure to stick around after the credits for a grand surprise...Avengers Assemble?
Thursday, May 01, 2008
Barnes' Favorite Fictional Bands: #7- Timmy and Lords of the Underworld
That's right. Do they have only one song? Yes. But that song rules. The Lords of the Underworld showed great potential but were missing a key ingredient...then it happened. Timmy and the Lords rocked on and rocked out at Chef Aid, displaying great beats and riffs. Granted the band is limited lyrically, but that doesn't stop them from getting the number seven spot on my list.Witness the band's greatest moment.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
This is Why I Love the Wall on Facebook
So I commented on my friend Andy Dunn's wall on Facebook regarding his profile photo:
"Deep down inside, I knew you were Zach Galifinakis."
He responded to my profile photo:
"Thanks Barnes, I'm glad you understand. Likewise, deep down inside I always knew you were a town of 2,173 people."
It's the little moments, people. The little moments.
Barnes' Favorite Fictional Bands: #8- Limozeen
The creators of Homestarrunner did a great job making a parody of 80's hair metal bands. How did these guys get featured on the Guitar Hero video game franchise? Practice, practice, practice. These guys reached at a number eight on the list not only because they do a great job in rocking and spoofing at the same time, but also doing live gigs! Kudos to you, Limozeen. Kudos.Meanwhile, on Television
According to this, a Family Guy spin-off based off the character Cleveland Brown titled (appropriately) Cleveland is almost confirmed for 13 episodes. Why do I have a feeling that this show will end up being a spoofy mix of The Jeffersons, A Different World and The Cosby Show? A couple predictions regarding the show:
- Cleveland will move into a more "urban" environment, but not a major city (New York, L.A., etc.). Since his name is Cleveland and they can't resist the irony, he'll probably move to Columbus or Cincinnati, Ohio.
- Cleveland's new friends would include a large, muscular black character with a shaved head and goatee, a stereotypical 1970's pimp character, and a Flava Flav archetype. Oh, and a random white guy that does nothing but stuff white people like and stuff that black comedians make fun of. Stuff like the stuff mentioned on this site.
- Carl Weathers will be mayor of whatever city Cleveland is in.
- Quagmire will frequently show up to hang out with Cleveland.
- There will be a talking animal character since Seth MacFarlane has Brian the Dog in Family Guy and Klaus the German Goldfish in American Dad. My guess is a cat.
Time will tell if I'm right.
- Cleveland will move into a more "urban" environment, but not a major city (New York, L.A., etc.). Since his name is Cleveland and they can't resist the irony, he'll probably move to Columbus or Cincinnati, Ohio.
- Cleveland's new friends would include a large, muscular black character with a shaved head and goatee, a stereotypical 1970's pimp character, and a Flava Flav archetype. Oh, and a random white guy that does nothing but stuff white people like and stuff that black comedians make fun of. Stuff like the stuff mentioned on this site.
- Carl Weathers will be mayor of whatever city Cleveland is in.
- Quagmire will frequently show up to hang out with Cleveland.
- There will be a talking animal character since Seth MacFarlane has Brian the Dog in Family Guy and Klaus the German Goldfish in American Dad. My guess is a cat.
Time will tell if I'm right.
I Just Smelled What Barack is Cooking...Along with What Hillary and John Have Broiled.
So many have asked me, since I am an avid wrestling fan, what I thought about Obama, McCain, and Clinton addressing the WWE fans during the live broadcast of WWE RAW a week and a half ago. I realize that I am a week late in addressing this issue, since most news media have already commented and lampooned over it, but since many have asked me my thoughts, especially since I unintentionally foreshadowed the "Do you smell what Barack is cooking?" line in a previous blog, I'll indulge them. I think the appearance of all three candidates was great...and awful.
The three candidates (or, let's face it, their campaign teams) realized that professional wrestling is an outlet enjoyed by numerous people throughout the U.S., including gun toting people who cling to religion (zing, Obama) and the more educated set. While the media continues to portray most wrestling fans as beer bellied, unschooled folk, the campaigns of all three candidates realize the mass appeal that pro wrestling has. Hell, WWE RAW has been one of the top ten viewed cable television programs for the past ten years. Face facts: a lot of people watch pro wrestling...people that vote. That is why I'm glad that all three acknowledged this usually snubbed group of voters.
However, I also think it was awful. Check out snippets of their videos here. Now, I readily know that these videos are supposed to be for fun, however their campaigns (save for McCain since his is smooth sailing until the quagmire that's been the Democratic nomination is settled) aren't supposed to be fun. While I am glad that wrestling fans are being addressed to, this is another attempt for all of them to "slum it up" to appeal to the "common man." I admit, I was entertained, but don't insult my intelligence.
Hil-Rod? Seriously?
First, Clinton looked like she read from cuecards and came off as fake as her sniper fire in Bosnia. Don't use wrestling rhetoric you don't understand and don't drink whisky at a bar that you'd never be caught dead in. Just say, "Hey wrestling fans, I think..."and insert your campaign promises and platform there. Be genuine for once okay? If you aren't familiar with the product, just say you aren't. Besides, the name Hil-Rod reminds me of A-Rod, a baseball player.
Secondly, Obama. While I don't mind him using the "Do you smell what Barack is cooking" line since the amusing comparison between him and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson has been established, I also think he read off of cue cards and he had a big "man, this is silly" smile throughout the whole thing. It is silly. Look, Barack, I know that you don't want to come off as an "elitist," but come on.
Random side note: Since when is being elite bad? "I don't want a candidate who thinks he's better than me." I got news for all you. The candidates are the candidates because they ARE better than you. And no matter how many Pabst Blue Ribbons they share in a bar with you, they KNOW they are better than you. I think it's a stupid notion that people want a candidate that is a "regular joe." I don't want a "regular joe." I want the best, the brightest, the strongest our country has to offer. I want someone who is among the...what's the word I'm looking for? Oh, yeah...ELITE! Mind you, don't confuse "elite" with "rich." Many folks are elite with or without the bank account, so don't take money into the equation. Folks, there are plenty of other intelligent reasons to be against certain candidates. I want to focus on the person that will prevent gas from being $5 a gallon, not the candidate who can at least bowl a 200.
Barack, you're not a wrestling fan. I'm not a graduate from Harvard. I'm okay with not attending an Ivy League school, like you did. You should be okay with not knowing what a Hornswoggle is, like I do. It's both okay.
McCain, while he was probably coached, actually came off like he had attended a wrestling match or two back in the day. Hell, he's old enough that he had to bump into at least one or two on T.V. While his verbal onslaught of every other wrestling catchphrase since 1985 was a bit much, he actually looked like he had fun. I'm sure he wasn't a genuine wrestling fan, but he at least faked it correctly. However, saying stuff like having the Undertaker take care of Osama Bin Laden makes me question your strategy and seriousness on the War on Terror.
Point is, while entertaining, all three of these candidates were being something that they aren't. While I am glad that they wanted to address the WWE audience, I don't like that they patronized the WWE audience. They could have used this opportunity to gain some votes by talking about the differences amongst the other candidates and addressing issues that the majority of fans in WWE's demographic care about. Instead, they mostly used it for expensive playtime. This could have been used to garner more votes. Instead, it made them, especially the Democrats, look like foolish posers. Candidates, you aren't wrestling fans...don't try to be me. Just talk to me. If you don't know the difference, then I can't help you.
At the same time though, like this amusing cartoon indicates, there probably isn't anything more phony than pro wrestling other than politics.
The three candidates (or, let's face it, their campaign teams) realized that professional wrestling is an outlet enjoyed by numerous people throughout the U.S., including gun toting people who cling to religion (zing, Obama) and the more educated set. While the media continues to portray most wrestling fans as beer bellied, unschooled folk, the campaigns of all three candidates realize the mass appeal that pro wrestling has. Hell, WWE RAW has been one of the top ten viewed cable television programs for the past ten years. Face facts: a lot of people watch pro wrestling...people that vote. That is why I'm glad that all three acknowledged this usually snubbed group of voters.
However, I also think it was awful. Check out snippets of their videos here. Now, I readily know that these videos are supposed to be for fun, however their campaigns (save for McCain since his is smooth sailing until the quagmire that's been the Democratic nomination is settled) aren't supposed to be fun. While I am glad that wrestling fans are being addressed to, this is another attempt for all of them to "slum it up" to appeal to the "common man." I admit, I was entertained, but don't insult my intelligence.
Hil-Rod? Seriously?
First, Clinton looked like she read from cuecards and came off as fake as her sniper fire in Bosnia. Don't use wrestling rhetoric you don't understand and don't drink whisky at a bar that you'd never be caught dead in. Just say, "Hey wrestling fans, I think..."and insert your campaign promises and platform there. Be genuine for once okay? If you aren't familiar with the product, just say you aren't. Besides, the name Hil-Rod reminds me of A-Rod, a baseball player.
Secondly, Obama. While I don't mind him using the "Do you smell what Barack is cooking" line since the amusing comparison between him and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson has been established, I also think he read off of cue cards and he had a big "man, this is silly" smile throughout the whole thing. It is silly. Look, Barack, I know that you don't want to come off as an "elitist," but come on.
Random side note: Since when is being elite bad? "I don't want a candidate who thinks he's better than me." I got news for all you. The candidates are the candidates because they ARE better than you. And no matter how many Pabst Blue Ribbons they share in a bar with you, they KNOW they are better than you. I think it's a stupid notion that people want a candidate that is a "regular joe." I don't want a "regular joe." I want the best, the brightest, the strongest our country has to offer. I want someone who is among the...what's the word I'm looking for? Oh, yeah...ELITE! Mind you, don't confuse "elite" with "rich." Many folks are elite with or without the bank account, so don't take money into the equation. Folks, there are plenty of other intelligent reasons to be against certain candidates. I want to focus on the person that will prevent gas from being $5 a gallon, not the candidate who can at least bowl a 200.
Barack, you're not a wrestling fan. I'm not a graduate from Harvard. I'm okay with not attending an Ivy League school, like you did. You should be okay with not knowing what a Hornswoggle is, like I do. It's both okay.
McCain, while he was probably coached, actually came off like he had attended a wrestling match or two back in the day. Hell, he's old enough that he had to bump into at least one or two on T.V. While his verbal onslaught of every other wrestling catchphrase since 1985 was a bit much, he actually looked like he had fun. I'm sure he wasn't a genuine wrestling fan, but he at least faked it correctly. However, saying stuff like having the Undertaker take care of Osama Bin Laden makes me question your strategy and seriousness on the War on Terror.
Point is, while entertaining, all three of these candidates were being something that they aren't. While I am glad that they wanted to address the WWE audience, I don't like that they patronized the WWE audience. They could have used this opportunity to gain some votes by talking about the differences amongst the other candidates and addressing issues that the majority of fans in WWE's demographic care about. Instead, they mostly used it for expensive playtime. This could have been used to garner more votes. Instead, it made them, especially the Democrats, look like foolish posers. Candidates, you aren't wrestling fans...don't try to be me. Just talk to me. If you don't know the difference, then I can't help you.
At the same time though, like this amusing cartoon indicates, there probably isn't anything more phony than pro wrestling other than politics.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Barnes' Top Ten Favorite Fictional Bands: #9- Wyld Stallyns
Ladies and gentlemen, meet Bill S. Preston, Esq. and "Ted" Theodore Logan. They are...WYLD STALLYNS! These two apparently-destined-to-be-great men forged a band so rockin' that they effect future politics and ways of life in the movies, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure and Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey. They weren't always good guitarists, as seen here, but their love of music and never say die attitude (and I really mean never say die, they survived going to Hell and beat Death in Battleship in order to get back to Earth). These gentlemen went to ultimate lengths to achieve their dreams and their passions, which serve as an inspiration to all of us. The two also preach the simple yet poignant axiom, "Be excellent to each other." It's with those reasons that the Wyld Stallyns get a spot at the list at number nine.
God gave rock and roll to us. Thank you, Bill and Ted, for reminding us.
Barnes' Top Ten Favorite Fictional Bands: #10- The Misfits
No, no, not these guys.
These girls.
Yes, that's right. The major villains in the 1980's animated series JEM broke into the top ten list. While I only caught mere glimspes of them during the show's run (I was too infatuated with Transformers, He Man, and Thundercats at the time), I am happy to include this bad girl group. While little girls might have been inspired by JEM and her Holograms, I think that the Misfits have possibly inspired future punk girl groups. Along with the show providing music videos of the Misfits, no doubt riding the then-pioneering MTV, and showing some...odd fashion sense caught my eye. Also the fact that their name and songs remind me of better music.
There is first Pizzazz Gabor, the lead vocalist and guitarist, fitting the stereotypical rich girl gone bad. She could go far if not for her obsession with Holograms and as long as no one refers to her real name, Phyllis. Then there is Roxy Pellegrini, the bassist of the group, a high school dropout who fights personal illiteracy with the power of rock. Stormer Philips, primary songwriter, the group conscience, and master of the almighty keytar! Rounding out the band is Jetta Burns, who is as good on the sax as she is at lying and stealing.
So congrats to the Misfits to making it to my list at number 10.
"Welcome to the Jungle" (Axl Rose is gonna sue for this one)
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